Need Help,Should i keep trying or move on,its been more than yr now.

Hi Kali,
I think you are thinking too much about the past. What happened, what could have happenned etc and you keep blaming yourself for how your ex gf is now. You are too harsh to yourself.
She might have been affecdted a lot about how things went wrong but its her choice to be stuck at that and warm it & bring it in front of you.
Do you realise yourself that you keep delaying moving on with your life? You have done everything you could to fix things. If it would be ok, it would have been ok by now…2 years is just too long.
I am sorry if i sound a bit harsh but i truly wish you to be happy. I feel like you are just delaying your happiness with someone else …
My opnion is that you should give this girl a real chance … And leave your past in the past. But if you feel you will feel regret for not speaking to your ex for one last time, then do it. But whatever she says to you, take it as it is and move forward. I mean if her answer is positive, make it clear to the new girl and start building a relationship with ur ex. If her response is negative, then dont think about it & move away from her.
I think if you are going to have this conversation its crucial to make her understand that u need to know whay she wants. If she gives you an answer which can be interpreted as good or a bad sign, then u will be in dark again. She has to be clear and honest to you.
What do u think?

do what you want to Kali none of us know exactly what is going on me what went on. we are making suggestions based on what you told us. which is your point of view. we don’t know her. and we are also biased in our suggestions based on what we have been through. did you hurt her? yes but that doesn’t mean you should not be forgiven it has been almost 2 years. she knew you were still dealing with a divorce while she was talking to you. listen whenyou have to know the person is not in a good place when you talk to someone so soon after they leave a relationship especially a marriage. however she chose to stay with you and I can tell you GREATLY appreciate her for that and are doing everything in your power to show her you changed and are different. you have a daughter who loves her too but she isn’t ready or doesn’t want to be more wit you at this point and you have to think about what is good for you and your daughter. what should she learn about love how it works. I don’t think it’s right for someone to say love is one way. yes sometimes as I said there will be times that one person is giving more but not all the time and the person receiving will appreciate the other for giving so much. you say she is always upset at you and barely initiates contact… love is kind, generous, forgiving and more. just cause you hurt her does not mean she can hurt you for sooo long. my ex got in a relationship after we broke up and that hurt mii but now he is asking for another chance and I know that I really love him and o forgave him and I’m moving psst whatever they did in their relationship and building some thING new…hopefully.. she didn’t have to ask you for help to heal you are doing it and honestly no one but her can heal herself. that’s why it’s good to forgive cause overall you’re not doing it for them but for yourself. I do think she may have feelings for you but you can’t spend the rest of your life waiting for that. you have to move forward after some time and when she is ready or in a good place then she will reach out properly and if you still want you guys can try then. we all have said after reading Kevin advice yoy kinda have to move forward before your ex sees you in a new light. right now you are kinda begging and clingy an needy and waiting and that’s not what attracts them back.. and you should move forward for yourself and your daughter. and I am hoping it works out for the best with you guys.. no one is saying you’ll definitely end up with the new girl but it’s a breath of fresh air. youre not constantly trying. date and do things for yourself. honestly I think you should be single for a year and just live for yourself and your daughter date and then when you are ready you can get bak in. but you have been in relationship and dealing with feelings have you had time to just worry about nothing that deals wit relationship. relationships are awesome and I love them but when it’s all just not wrkn out sometimes it’s good to take a step bak and not dive into anything serious. my advice is forgive yourself, heal and do whats right for you and your daughter and let things work themselves.. don’t force anything… you’ve done alot and things happen… like elana said we should think of others feelings even when they didnt. that goes for your ex to doesn’t it. it’s all a cycle that someone has to decide to break. you moving forward is thinking about you, hers and alot of ppls feelings. it’s better for everyone and one day maybe you’ll both be in a better place to make it work or meet other ppl who will be suited better for you both.. like Kevin said sometimes we may not b able to get them back. . and we have to be okay with that… I do hope cause I see you really love her that you get her bak. but for now maybe move forward and focus on your daughter and yourself

Hi Kali,
It is normal to be frustrated and tired after so long time of chasing her.
About the car, you shouldn’t think this way, she probably didn’t want to brag about it. When her sister told you, did you text her with your congratulations to show her that you are happy about her achievement?

I read your post twice trying to find a common sense.
It is obvious that you are angry with her. Not answering her calls looks like playing a game. It is very likely that she will not want to be involved in this game.
You are talking about an ultimatum, in fact the same what I suggested you to do in a proper serious conversation. Now, did you tell her somehow that you are not interested in her unless she wants a relationship with you? Or do you hope that she will find out about that by not answering her calls?

Kali, only you know if you still love your ex and how strong, If you are in love with her you would accept her for what she is stubborn or not. There is no relationship without problems, however if there is love the problems can be solved.
I am not here to tell you what to do. I can only give my opinion and encourage you whatever your decision is.
Again about my experience, both my marriages were with someone who loved me. I thought that it’s not so important if I was in love with the person. I was wrong. You again mentioned that the other girl loves you but you don’t say if you love her. Will you be happy with someone you just like?
Begging doesn’t work, no need to say that. Women like confident men and those they can rely on.
For you most important now is to calm down and be confident. You are not old believe me, no need to rush into anything if you are feeling confused or not sure what you want. At least this way you will avoid more mistakes.
You deserve to be happy!