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Long story short we broke up on October 16 and then next day i did something really stupid i stalked her. I drove by her house and stayed out in front of her house for little bit because she wasn’t there. I missed her and wanted to see her and i had a gift for her for our anniversary. October 17th was our anniversary. Whenever i went i thought i will go text her and ask if she wants to meet for little bit, i just wanted to see her and give the gift but whenever i got there she wasn’t there and i lost it and was really upset so i stayed there for little bit and left.
Next morning i felt bad about what i did so i told her and now she is scared of me and we don’t talk. she knows i will never harm her and i had a good intention but the stuff i did was wrong. i told her I’m sorry and i even told her that what i did because it wasn’t right. Now we don’t talk and I’m trying to keep no contact with her and this is the 6th day of no contact. My dilemma right now is we go to same school and have same class. we both are taking java class and she’s not so good on it. i always helped her with homework and prepare her for exam. We have a homework due on Monday and i already finished her and before i always use to send it to her. Idk if i should still send it to her, i want too and i know she will never ask me for it. I know she won’t but at the same time i don’t want our issues to hamper our studies. I want to send her but at the same time i feel like what if she thinks look at him sending me homework and not leaving me alone. I don’t want her to feel that, i wanna give her space but at the same time i don’t her to jeopardize school.
Please let me know what should i do, i still care and love her and i know the only way of us getting back together will be by giving her space but right now more important thing in both of our life is graduate. We are graduating this December and i don’t want and won’t be able to see her failing class. That will hurt me a lot when i know maybe if i could have just not think about anything and send her the Homework. This homework worth lot of points, if i do send her should i say anything like hey i don’t want our issues to hamper our studies or should i just send it without anything. I want to help her but at the same time i don’t wanna present myself being needy. Please give me some advice.
Thank You
And also we had a quiz for another class yesterday and whenever teacher said we will have a quiz in (this was Tuesday) class she wasn’t present so I send her an email saying we have quiz on Thursday and she replied back to me saying it’s on the syllabus and I have it on my calendar, thank you for letting me know. She didn’t even came yesterday for it, idk if she’s going through hard time like I’m but at the end of the day I don’t wanna see her giving her future away. She’s talented,hard working and really nice person.
Honestly, I think you shouldn’t send it. She is the one who took the class to begin with so it’s up to her to pass the class. I think it would be smart to give her some time and space right now. The purpose of no contact is to focus on you, not her. Right now you’re still stuck on her. I understand where you’re coming from. My ex loves running. She went to college for cross country and it seemed like she would be great at it. But this new guy she’s with is a bad influence. He’s also on the team but he smokes pot and parties all the time. So now she does too, which has massed up her running in the process. I care about her and i wish she wouldn’t have let an opportunity like that go to waste. So ik where you’re coming from when you say you care about her studies. But you need to just let it be right now. Let her be on her own. And again, focus on yourself for now.
Carey thank you for your response, yes you’re right she took the class and it’s her responsibility to be mature and focus on things that matter. you’re right I’m still stuck on her it’s still fresh and both of us need time to heel. I just don’t want her to think that I don’t care about her and didn’t even help her with homework when she knows that I know she don’t know how to do it. I don’t her to feel like I don’t care about her, even we don’t get back together I wanna see her successful in life. She have lot of potential to do great in life. I want her to do all the best and if I can help some for her to reach that level i want too.
My problem is, will she thinks that I’m bugging her if I send her an email and if I don’t will she thinks that I don’t care about her anymore and just start to move on. Both situations hurts I really care and want to send it to her and at the same time idk how she will take it. I don’t wanna present myself as being needy person.
Either way you come out in a losing situation. But sending it would be the worst decision. You actually want her to think that you’re taking steps to get over her. Later on it’ll make her miss you more. And by helping before it already showed her you cared. But right now if you were to send it, it wouldn’t make her think you cared. It’d only make you look like you aren’t really over her. Now obviously the breakup is still fresh. And you really do need to separate yourself from her. Worrying about if she thinks you don’t care about her because you didn’t let her cheat in a class she decided to take isn’t going to do that. Just take things one day at a time. It gets easier. For now really focus on you and your grades. Find new and fun things outside of school to distract you. Go for a run, get in good shape, hang out with friends. Be an active person because later on it’ll only make you a more confident and attractive person.
PS.
She’s not going to just move on super quick. You two dated for a little while so obviously you meant something to her. It’ll take her some time to really move on. Several months most likely. Just take it easy and take it slow. Patience is extremely important right now. Work on yourself for now and tell yourself that she’s not going to move on anytime soon. That way you can take those steps to improving you.
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