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Ok.
So 4 year relationship came to an end in June last year when I blocked my ex for 2 weeks and did no communication.
But after 2 weeks passed by,i missed her and could not hold more so I did everything possible to get her back to my life it can be begging,flowers,apologies,door mat,crying and lot more.But she had no effect at all and remained same on her decision of not coming back to my life.She is very stubborn and was chasing me for 2 years to get married but I could not as of my complications and cases with ex wife.Even I gave her ring in March and promised to get married after I get done with my cases but right I was getting done with my ex wife,this worst thing (break up) changed my life.
Finally gave up and started doing NC from JAN 1st week and till now things are pretty much same,i mean I have been patient and doing NC but I don’t know if it is working or not but I am loosing hope and feels once its get over it do get over.
Here below are details after I did NC :-
1) My ex g/f first contact after 40 days of NC in email asking me her resume in email,replied to the point and sent her resume.
2) Approx after 52 days my ex g/f best friend contact asking to get her rental which I replied to the point.
3) After approx. 70 days I showed house to my ex g/f best friend,and g/f came with her,and saw improved me really new version of me.
4) Last week her best friend added me on her facebook which I accepted.
Now,reaching 90 days of NC and not sure how long this journey is but I am loosing hope and strength to wait.
Point 1,2,3 was there before too, when I was not doing NC.
What do you guys think should I leave hope and move on,or wait for some more time,been already waiting from last year June.
Please Advice and thank for reading here.I appreciate it.
Send her a written letter. Have u done that yet? I would try that before calling or texting. Tell her she was right for doing what she did. That your better person for it happening. That you’ve learned a lot about yourself and what u want in life. Don’t talk to much specifics about your mistakes. Tell her good things are happening for u but don’t go into detail about it. See how that works. If after she gets it and she doesn’t contact u than u might be fighting an uphill battle. Has she dated at all? If not that could be a sign she’s not over u completely. If she’s worth it keep trying to get her back without it looking desperate
I haven’t send her any letter and don’t plan to do it for another 2/3 months as Kevin forums you will see that sometimes NC will take 2-6 months of time,i have not done any texting or calling just replied to her when she asked for resume in an email and her friend when she asked for rental house.
I don’t think she is dating when I met her in person with her best friend,she looked more like a depressed person than happy girl but I am not sure very frankly.
She is worth to wait and try that’s a reason I have been patiently waiting for her from last one year.
Looks like she is interested but made herself very distant as of past and a overthinking about future with me… where different religions, I guess are also playing some sort of roles.
I have showed her my improvements but she knows that I have not moved on yet and waiting her to come back in my life.
I think she still cares for u but u really hurt her. If she seems depressed and hasn’t dated shows she still cares. I think she wants to be 100% sure youve changed before she’ll tell u how she feels. She put a lot of effort into the relationship. I’m sure she thinks u didn’t put in the same amount she did. Just be patient keep working on yourself until your ready to do the letter. Than see if things change.
Yes you are 100 % true on your statement,i think she still cares about me.She is definitely depressed about me and her family stress.Yes she is committed and old traditional kind girl where she wants full 100 % confidence in me,she gave me for 4 years with full dedication and serious intention to get married and have family.
I definitely didn’t put any efforts as compared to her in relationship that’s a reason I am suffering from last one year.
I am been patient and been waiting for her every second of my life and let me tell you its is very hard.Thanks Eric for great help and opinion I think you are right on your statements,i appreciate it very much.
Well your doing all u can now. That’s all u can do. I’ve only been without my ex for not even two months. She called me today and we talked for an hour. None of it was relationship talk just catching up and even some joking around. She told me last week she missed me and she would’ve came out to my house if I was there that day. She wanted me to hold her and said I make her feel better when she’s depressed. I’m hopeful but not going to push it until she tells me she’s ready.
Its gotta be tough waiting as long as u have. I’m glad I could help in anyway. Hopefully she’ll start contacting u. Time is on your side
June 1st it will be one year it was very tough journey for me emotionally…I am not good at all on this love cycle or breakups….I just take care of my own business.
I think I can only patiently wait and see. If she doesn’t come back there is nothing I can do to change her mind.
But same time I am slowly trying to have the communication lines open,which is same from her end I guess.
Thanks Eric for input @ I am sure I hurt her very bad but my intentions were not to hurt her,i did loved this girl from all my heart.
That was my mistake. I took her for granted. I think us guys sometimes take are women for granted and don’t show them how much we care for them. I guess we think we tell them we love them but they want and deserve better attention. We have to show them that we care, that we love them more than we can ever show. That’s what they want and most guys aren’t consistent with it
Agree with you Eric @ Girls only need attention especially when they are serious towards you and there future.
But, now the point is how to get them back and forgot past.Also make some strategy or plan to make it happen.
My strategy is to keep NC with keeping communication lines open means sending an email once in every 2/3 weeks with some solid reasoning, so it won’t look desperate or she gets any sort of sense.
What do you think and what are your plans ?
I’m letting her contact me mostly. I think we’re at a point that we can talk without rehashing the mistakes I made. I tried NC but she’ll contact me before I can make it a week. Things feel like there headed in the right direction. I think your doing good and your showing her that she important by not being with anybody and by giving her space. Just see how it’s going and if she becomes more receptive keep your patience. She’s waiting for u I think. She will get there. That’s what I’m hoping. U need to give time for the bad memories to fade. They won’t totally forget but u replace those memories with some good ones and she will remember why she chose u in the first place. You’ll know when to stop the NC and start fresh
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