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Hi guys,
I thought I’d get some quick advice. So my ex wants to meet up for a coffee/possibly grab some food in a few weeks. It’s gonna be the first time I’ve seen her in just over a year and she’s been in a long-distance relationship for pretty much dead on a year now too.
She wanted to meet up for coffee a few weeks back but within 10 minutes she changed her mind and said she couldn’t as she “respects her current relationship and her boyfriend too much.” Then she does a total 180 a couple weeks later and says lets meet up for coffee and maybe grab food. It confused me a bit considering she was staunchly against it beforehand.
I just wondered if I could get some advice on how to play it? I don’t think her current relationship is under strain and that’s the reason she wants to see me, purely because she’s still posting pictures of herself and her boyfriend online. But I just need some advice on how to do this because I’m obviously going to be nervous and I need to know how to play it.
Would appreciate anything!
Thanks,
Rich
“So my ex wants to meet up for a coffee/possibly grab some food in a few weeks.” A few weeks? Perhaps she will change her mind again..
First of all, She’s with someone else and I don’t see any reason for you to meet up with her. I think you both need to accept the breakup and move on with your lives.
She had talked about meeting for a “thank you” coffee and then changed her mind. It seems she’s yanking you around because she knows you’re still longing after her..
But if you’re determined to meet her, act casual and let her do most of the talking.
Yeah, I figured she’d might change her mind again after how she’s been in the past. I’m prepared for that. It’s just neither of us were free for a few weeks.
I’ve wondered if she wanted to meet to just wipe the slate and actually enforce some proper closure as it’s been a bit up in the air since, a bit of an overlap.
The alternative to that is that she really is yanking me around? If you think so, what’s the reason behind doing that? I don’t get it, she’s never seemed like that kind of person.
“If you think so, what’s the reason behind doing that?”
To keep you as a safety net.
That’s the logical answer but she seems happy to me. To suggest that she’s keeping me as a safety net and yanking me around all the time would suggest she’s not happy in her relationship or had entertained the idea that it could end.
I don’t know, I think I’m gonna take Patricia’s advice and just let her talk. About the meet up and at the meet up if it goes ahead.
Besides, she doesn’t know I’m still into her. I’ve been dating but it’s a bit presumptuous of her to think I’m totally still into her and only her, don’t you think? From her perspective.
I think that she wants to know if you are still into her. If she can have you as a safety net.
If you are planning on going act like everything between two of you happened a long time ago.
Imagine yourself how would you act if it was a five years from now.
Be nice and happy. Don’t talk about any of yours or hers relationship, not even the one between the two of you.
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