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Hi everyone,
I have a situation well here it goes my boyfriend (my ex) and I been dating for almost a year and we broke up around 3 weeks ago or so after the brake up I was shocked and desperate on the day we broke up I try to convince him to fix our issues we got he didn’t wanted to since he said he tired of the drama and arguments we had a few times I know for sure o done some damage since I tend to say things I don’t mean to say like “you got time time to talk to others but not to me? Well good luck than” I know I overreact to certain things I of course felt guilty to say stuff and did apologied to him after I cool off this last one was a shock he said he tired of the drama and arguments and that we should be just friends and that he needs space I didn’t like the fact he broke up with me first place but after having my own time and space I have realized I done mistakes and I do want to fix them because I love him and he very important than not saying sorry to him for a mistake.I did ask him if he loved me enough he would help me fix this issue between us he said he loves me but tired of all of arguments. After 3 days apart I did send him a text saying why I reacted the way I did and apologized to him too and that we need some time as well and that I hope we try again a new start after sending that he ignored it and I felt sad he did that but maybe it was to soon to tell? From these weeks passed now I not try to contact him after I found this web site that did help me understand the issue and wanted to respect my ex what he asked but weird part is I haven’t try to talk to him first but he try to talk to me like 3 times these weeks after the brake up last one did made me very confused I send him a gift be4 we were ok was a love letter and a couples ring I thought it would be cute to give him one to wear since I have the other half of the ring heart both rings make a full heart he text me that he got my gift and send me a pic of him wearing the ring on his finger I was super shy and happy the same time he let me know he got it and took a pic as well I told him he can keep it or throw it away if he likes he said he keep it (i kinda thought he grow it away) since first time I send a guy I liked a lot a gift so confused with what I feel I wanna tell him badly I love him but I can’t we broke up and I don’t know what I can do right now trying to stay in NC but its very hard after last convo he did. Can anyone help me plz?
me and someone else had a simmilar conversation.. maybe you want to join us? 🙂
If he wanted to fix things, he would’ve told you that he wants to reconcile and give your relationship another chance. It seems like you are the one trying to reel him back into your life and he has tossed you into the friend zone. Stop writing him love letters and sending him gifts. Let him feel what life is like without you. Pretend that he doesn’t exist on this planet and go on with your life. If he wants you back, he will let you know.
Let me rephrase that I sent the stuff be4 we broke up it took a month to get there. And he did decided to let me know when he revived it . He said thanks for gift he loved it and wanted to keep it so not sure why he would but he did and last time I talked to him cuz I wanted todo NC and how am I reeling him in if he the one talk to me first after the brake up ?All I wanna know if this is agood idea to do NC not to betold wrongly by someone =/
And at the moment he said he needs space even tho he said he loves me but hates the drama and argument. So I am respecting his wish to give him space and to think even I need it as well since going through a hard time and noticing the errors days by day and ofc trying to be happy for me so I am working on myself to be better cuz what I did in the relationship I was needy and insecure a lot and wanna fix that about me since he is important to me is why I wanna get him back but I haveto be happy for me first be4 I do anything just not sure from a guys perspective if what he doing means something.
You keep asking why he keeps texting you. The answer is because he is feeding you breadcrumbs which a lot of exes do. Breadcrumbs are random text messages that keep you interested and give you false hope all the while feeding his ego while they leave you feeling like crap.
It’s a great idea to do NC because it’s absolutely necessary in this case. Listen to him when he says he needs space and give it to him. When he texts you, ignore him. You won’t get what you want from responding to his texts anyways. You want a lot more than he is willing to actually give to you.
It seems like you are looking into his actions and applying the meaning that you want. You probably think that if he’s keeping the ring, that he still loves you and wants to get back together with you. I asked my boyfriend of 7 years on his thoughts since you said you wanted a guy perspective. He says that your ex keeping the ring doesn’t mean anything besides the fact that he thought it was a cool ring. And if he wanted to work on the relationship, he would. But the fact that he’s keeping you at a distance gives you all the info you need. Actions speak louder than words. A guy that is interested and wants to continue the relationship will want to work on it. A guy that thinks you are too much drama and insecure for him will slowly take steps out of your life until he fades out of your life for good.Seems to me that way you call”solving” the issue works for you and does seems you need to work on your own issues your not welcome to be negative here to anyone but yourself not everyone is same as you tend to be we are here to talk about our issues on what we are suffering cuz we are human and not broke down by how you may see it way you do I will ask you to leave here your not welcome with words that you say from out of your mouth. Thanks for reading.
lol I wasn’t being negative, on the contrary. And did you get your ex-boyfriend back yet? It’s very obvious that you only consider yourself and didn’t even think of what your ex was feeling when you were being bitchy to him. Guys hate dealing with drama-it’s a nightmare for them!! And you trying to convince him to come back-I guarantee is only pushing him further and further away. And you can’t ever convince an ex to work on a relationship if he feels his life is better without you in it. And if he hasn’t come back, it’s because he’s enjoying life single and without a girlfriend that brings nothing but drama, insecurity and problems in his life.
Actually you are being negative plus that wasn’t a good impression in first post
you did plz reread what you say to others be4 you post anything and how we all feel.
I am only being honest on what you said cuz it’s wrong and you know that so I don’t tend to lie about it. And about my issue well yea I did
I admit I said some things wrong due to that but this was be4 and I know I am working on myself to be better and if I didn’t care about him why would I even give my time to text him explaining what my behavior and apologized as well that’s
being human isn’t it? We aren’t perfect we do mistakes
But at least I care enough that I explain myself but I am wasn’t the one that had issues he had many as well and ofc i have support and cared enough you don’t know whole story and I tend to shoot some of us down in a bad way recognize your mistakes when you talk to ppl
and how they are feeling right now I am sorry if I was
Acting strict but I am honest
The way your acting on post isn’t good so recognize what you say. ThanksMy advice wasn’t wrong at all. You simply think it’s wrong or “shooting you down” because you didn’t like hearing the truth about your situation. And if you are honest with yourself, you know that I’m telling you the truth.
The fact is if this guy loved you enough even though you are miles away, he would want to work on your issues and get through the problems in it. Together.But he chose the easiest way out and walked out of the relationship. Nothing you say or do can change that fact. He has to want to come back to you on his own terms.
And you can’t justify all types of bad behavior such as insecurity and bringing drama into a relationship by saying “well that’s being human”.
I don’t know your whole story but I do have plenty of long distance relationship experience so I know what I’m talking about. I’ve been with my guy for 7 years..5 of those were long distance and the last two we have happily lived together. So following my advice would have helped bring your ex back. If you can get past your ego!
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