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@Nedim and yes I do want to text him back but I feel like
if I do that at the moment he
Will not miss me as much as I
do miss him he did say he needed space for himself so trying to do that and I am trying to give myself space to be independent I been to clingy for a while with him that I forgot how to be happy
I am so used to being happy while we talk text ect and flirt I just feel like I lost
my partner for that but best we just have this space now to realize we are missing something I don’t wanna push him to get back together cuz on our brake up day I did ask
him to fix our issues by talking it out and told him if he loves me enough he should do that if he told me that I do it what is more important then your love wants to fix an issue we are facing? I am an understanding
person ofc but I guess I am noticing I have jealously issues and say something I don’t mean but feel guilty after and say I am sorry I act like that I guess this time wasn’t good to many build up as being tired of it
aka he had enough patience hedid say he still loves me just tired of issues. I still
feel bad but I already text him be4 to be clean what I did and explain he didn’t reply is it bad? Or he just mad? Not sure but I said this be4 sorry it just bothers me if he notice that letting go would be worth it or will he try later cuz he miss me again? I don’t understand men so much but I do know for us it’s really love .Okay, Just the very quick update that I have promised :
My ex came home. She said nothing about that boy. I’m still worrying, but now I’m a little bit more relaxed.
@aqua I’ll write a reply to your pont in my next long post, possibly tomorrow (idk what is your time zone so let’s Say that on Saturday.) Now I’m only wtiting from smartphone.Keep on fighting guys!!!
Oh and no worries I been working on myself ofc from past few days and weeks afterthe brake up I got my first car (so proud of myself) and gone out to the movies and places so doing fine but still have here and there missing feelings for my
ex woundering if he will miss
me ect but hey ok still working on my self and NC. Oh
And forgot to say my last convo with him was 1 week ago(he text me I didn’t) saying he received the couples ring (i sent this a month ago be4 brake up) he said thank you and will keep this as a good memories I told him if he wants he can throw it away or keep I foundit weird a little to keep it after we broke up but
ok weird huh?
Sorry if talk a lot just needed this off my chest. XD@Nedim oh no problem I am also using phone to type here
lol and I see well good she didn’t say anything about the
guy she is with for all you know she might have went shopping for herself xD (i know am being girly) but is what I would do ofc! Just enjoy talking with her when your able to I doudt she will
forget about you that easy o still think she on a rebound relationship so it will take time to see who she really will miss =)@Nedim
thanks for the kind words.. at the moment i’m quite drunk .. sorry ^^
i’ll give you some useful talk tomorrow morning (if i dont forget :/ )till tomorrow… stay strong! 🙂
alright, now that i’m sober i can write properly 😀
so i didnt meet with that girl yet but i’m still a bit confused if i should…
obviously i don’t have a problem with me having sex with her but it might get confusing if i get back together with my ex. still gotta think about it..
She’s hot and hey… we are talking about emotionless sex which is great but still.. my emotions confuse me ^^Changing the profile picture is a good idea! 🙂
Make sure it shows your new self and it will work for you really nicely!nice story 🙂
who knows.. maybe you can do all that again with her 😉My ex has her birthday today and since we have NC atm i didnt write her anything. She then sent me a message that she can’t believe that i didn’t even write her on such a important day and that she asked if that means that we aren’t meeting on the 18th. About an hour later i wrote back that we will still be meeting on the 18th and that i sent her a letter but it seems like its coming too late (i didn’t send it yet..) i then told her that my mum is in hospital since yesterday (which is true) so i didn’t see the message (which is not true).
She then asked what is wrong with my mum (so no talking about the birthday anymore or her being angry about it!)
again about an hour later i answerd that she has a problem with her lungs an now gets oxygen and stuff.
She answered that she’s very sorry and that she hopes that she’ll be fine again soon.
I answered that i’m sure that she’ll be fine again and that i take care of the housekeeping at the moment. then i just said that i wish her a nice day and a lot of fun and that I’m arriving on 15:03.
She said that thats good (housekeeping) and thanked me.I hope she won’t sleep with anyone tonight because she misses me and well.. yeah.. that’s what i’m hoping. I do hope that she misses me (which she seems to do since there wouldnt be a reason to be angry at me for not wishing her a nice birthday etc.)
There’s only one thing why I wouldn’t do this ‘friends with benefits’, and this is my virginity. I want to lose it with someone special, and not in a sex without real love.
I can understand that you’re confused. But don’t think about your ex. Do what you want to do, what makes you feel better, without considering what your ex thinks about it. Of course, if you don’t think that it’s a right decision, you don’t have to do that.Meeh, I think you should have greeted her >< It would have not counted as a violation towards NC. But what you write about missing is logical. If she hadn’t missed you, she would have not sent message and complained why you hadn’t greeted her. It means that she expected your greeting, she was waiting for you.
I’ve said, weirder and weirder thing are coming 😀 But the point is that she is not angry.
It’s not a problem that you lie to her. Of course it’s not nice to lie to someone in any case, but this time, you have to be mean, you have to concentrate more on yourself and your own benefits. Remember: everything is fair in love and war. Especially, when love is war! 😀The “fixing the issues” thing is too familiar to me. Me and my ex promised that we would talk about every little issue and problem in our relationship. Actually, she was the one who made this agreement. But it didn’t happen. We did not talk about issues in the last one month. It was the time period when it became more and more obvious that there’s something wrong in the relationship. I’ve tried to talk with her about it, but I did not succeeded. She always brought up a new topic, or said that there’s nothing wrong. And yeah, now this is where we ended up.
You’re right, he might be mad. The break up is hard for him as well, he is uncertain in his feelings. But at least, he has something in which he can be uncertain, and that means that he was truly in love with you. Of course, the problem is that he just ‘was’ in love 🙁For me, nothing happened today. The only thing that bothers me is that my ex played a game during the whole day, and the other guy recommended it for her.
She never played those games that I’ve recommended for her. Actually, she doesn’t really plays video games at all. Strange.
It’s interesting to think about that the date of the filming (18th) is also the date when we’ll be broken up for 2 months. I can’t believe that 2 months have passed so fast. So many things happened… So many changes, improvements, new things… But it still hurts like it hurt 2 months before. Okay, not like right after the break up, but… it didn’t really change at overall. I’m still full of fear, still having lot of questions, and memories, dreams, promises, pictures of the possible future with her are still running through my head over and over.
And I’m uncertain about plenty of things. For example… The film shooting will be a huge thing, but what should I do after it? She won’t run to me right after she saw the video. Maybe she’ll see how much I’ve improved and I’ll get some good points at her, but she won’t run to me and say that “omg I want to get back together with you”. Actually, I don’t have future plans, I’m just hoping that things will arrange somehow, and we will start to talk… But I don’t really know :/ Maybe by the time I get there, I will know what to do (or maybe my friends or this forum will help me).Wow, only a week until 18th! 😀 I’m already really excited.
@Nedim
No.. i lost it to my ex on the first day we met ^^
Quite straight forward i guess… 😀Well.. it’s hard to not think about my ex when she has her birthday and i know that she misses me ^^
I think in the end i did the right thing today and just hope that she keeps missing me and isn’t looking for affection in someone else.Right now i’m supportive about sleeping with that new girl but somehow my opinion changes all the time which is quite weird but hey.. that’s not something that happens every day ^^
I’m really looking forward on meeting my ex again and asking her how her auditions in Berlin for univeristy went and about her B-Day and all that stuff ^^
But i also want to get REALLY drunk with her.. should end up in a lot of fun 😀
I feel like i’m kind of over her because i still think about her but it’s not like i feel like crying or anything… i guess i kind of accepted that it could be forever but having a few more days of NC will help even more 🙂Hm.. it really seems like your ex wants to change in some ways but i’m not sure why..
What game did she play?I think that you will know what to do when you need to know. You’re right that she probably won’t run up to you like that but i think she might act a little different and after the video or actually after she saw it you should be on a STRICT NC. I’d advise you to not talk to her or the groupchat.. She’ll think a lot about you and will wonder where you’re at. And then 1-3 days later you write her. 🙂
Personally i think that’s the right move but maybe you think that something else is better. If so, do that 🙂Since my ex broke up with me on the 21st last month it’s nearly a month for me and actually it’s 1 month since i saw her the last time at my place…
I’m really interested in how things will turn out on the 18th – for us both! 🙂I don’t really know what to write but the one thing i can tell you is that right now you should focus on all the problems you had but just for yourself and change those things but don’t talk with your ex about it. Your ex will notice ! 🙂
-Andi
On the first day?! Oh… It’s kind of… quick 😀
Inform me what will be your final decision about sleeping with that girl! 🙂
A suggestion for the meeting: You’ve mentioned some question that you want to ask from her. Actually, you can think about and learn some topic ideas to talk about. It wouldn’t be nice if the typical awkward silence appeared.
Be aware of being drunk with her. She is in a really strange place at your life now, and you shouldn’t do silly, stupid things with her that you’ll regret. But of course, for fun, it’s okay 😀My ex played Borderlands (I don’t know which episode). When she was at my place, we played Minecraft, Sims… so something which is more favorable for girls too.
I think that she wants to change as well. And I don’t want to be egoist, but it seems that the only difference is that she is not as successful as me. The only real change is her hair color. The length of her hair doesn’t count, she wanted to cut it down when we were together too. She didn’t change her clothing habits neither, and she didn’t manage to lose weight. And the make-up on her… It looked very very weird.
But I still don’t know why she is trying to change: for me, for an other guy, or just in general.
It’s good that you’re some kind of over her. I’ve realized that I’m not in love with my ex anymore. Actually, I got used to the feeling of NC. I don’t feel a need to talk with her. On the other hand, I still check how long ago was she active on Facebook.
I don’t miss her. I only miss the relationship, and the girl who was beside me, not the girl who is she today. I hope it makes sense ><
I have ups and downs. Now, I’m definitely on an “up”, I think about her less, it hurts less, etc. But for example, one week ago it was definitely a “down”. I don’t know how long will it be changing. Even if it’s an up right now, I still want her back, and it’s still painful to recall what a beautiful couple we could have been.
Actually, it just came to my mind that we’ve survived quarter of the LDR part. One and a half year later we would live together in an apartment house in Budapest.Hmm. The short term strict NC seems to be a great idea 😀 I’ll publish a teaser from the video right after the filming, and some days later, I’ll release the full length video. Fortunately, I’m the one who will edit the video, so I don’t have to wait for others, and I’ll also have a great excuse why I am not so active in the group chat 😀
I’ve just realized that an other great opportunity is coming exactly one week after the filming. On 25th, there will be a gamer event in Budapest (yeah, in Hungary, everything happens at Budapest, lol). There will be some famous youtubers there, and I think I’ll make an interview with them to our webpage 😀 My ex would be jealous as hell. She wants to be a journalist, so she said that she is going mad for these things, like making interviews, etc 😀 And also, this event provides a great program for me for that week.
About the interviews, I’m uncertain, but if i do that, and i do them well, it will be a really huge combo hit together with the film 😀And oh… My ex was at my place 4 months ago, at New Year’s Eve. It was pretty long time ago, but I can still find hairbreadths in my bed from her 😀
I’ll finalize and discuss the plans for 18th with the others tomorrow. I’m really curious how things will happen on 18th for both of us! 🙂
Mini update: I went to the attic for some old boxes, and while I was there, I found that bag into which I put everything what I had got from my ex. As I’ve mentioned in the previous post, the pain is not present that much in these days, so I decided to look into the bag. Surprisingly, I had no bad feelings or pain coming up, just a “meh” feeling. I was watching a tiny pictures of us in a frame for one minute. I was not thinking about anything, I just… watched that beautiful girl with that happy boy sitting in a park, holding each others’ hand.
Then I’ve found that blue box, that I’ve mentioned before in connection with smells, and… yeah, I removed the cover of it, and smelled into it. Incredible. The smell faded a little, but it’s still so strong.
Then I thought it was enough. I zipped back the bag and continued my way to the old boxes.
I thought I would have worse feelings from that bag. Never mind.Well.. yeah.. we were kind of quick and i definitely don’t regret it 😀
So.. i told that one girl the truth about what’s going on in my life at the moment and that it could be that i have to stop the contact to her if i get back together with my ex since i’m 100% loyal when i’m in a relationship. At first she reacted very .. hm.. cold i guess. Just very short answers and no emoticons.. i think you know what i mean. But later that day she asked me if i wanted to meet with her and her cousin (female and 16 aswell) but sadly i had to say no.
Right now there are 2 girls that i met and i’d sleep with if i can until 18th. Both of them are very… interesting 😀
I didn’t tell the second girl about my ex since i dont really know her that much yet and i’d just simply stop the contact if necessary.I dont really know how to explain but i’m kind of fine with it if i dont get back together with my ex again but obviously i’d be really happy if we’d love each other again. But we’ll see on the 18th..
If she has changed a lot and i don’t have feelings for her “new” self i might aswell stay single and have interests in other girls 😉
If we love eachother again, she’ll by the only one in my life.I feel like your ex really tries to change but just cant really do it. Only she knows why she tries so hard..
If you are not in love with the girl she is now, then there is no reason to get back together with her. I hope that doesnt sound rude but we all have to accept that things have changed and we have aswell. If you really dont love her anymore then you might be better off with being just friends with her. But first make sure that you REALLY arent anymore!!Cool.. which youtubers will be there? 🙂
I really hope that she notices your changes and that both of you will be happy in the end 🙂Haha ^^
My ex was here one mobth ago and we were in an empty flat and there’s still all of our stuff there. I wasnt in there since then.. ^^Yes the 18th is coming soon! 🙂
Huh.. interesting. Tell me more about how you feel about the past if you want to 🙂
I myself stopped smelling the shirt when i went into strict NC and now i dont know if i should risk smelling at it again.. i dont want to lose all the progression that i have with kind of getting over her. I think it might be better to nkt smell it but smell herself on the 18th and see if something changed.Good luck in the new week 🙂
And sorry.. i wrote that all from my phone.. so i hope its not too bad :I
-AndiActually, it’s good that you wrote, even from phone 😀 And it’s also understandable.
Wow! Two girls? 😀 It seems that life is going well for you! (I hope there’s a saying like that in english :D)
You don’t have to tell her anything about your ex if you don’t want to, and your relationship with her is not so personal. You just want to have fun with her, and if nothing more happens, you don’t have to tell her personal things. And what’s more, it’s also good for you if you don’t talk about your ex. People will think that you’re not over her if you mention her too much. Of course, this webpage is an exception 😀
Do you know anything about how your ex changed? Or do you have any expectations for 18th?
Until 18th, I recommend you to prepare yourself for both cases: getting back together, or drifting apart more. Both could happen. The aim is obviously the first one, and personally, I think you have chances, but you have to be happy even if you don’t get her back. According to what you’ve written, you’re some kind of prepared, but you know… It’s not the same when you can hope for something, and when you don’t even have the hope.To be honest, I’m in a really strange situation. I think I don’t love her like I did. But when something happen, for example, she mentions that boy, some kind of fear appears in me. And I have a need to get her back, even if I’m not in love with her now. I don’t know how to explain, but it’s like… I want to be in love with her again. To be exact: I want the “New Me” to be in love with the “New Her”. Maybe I’m weird, maybe I’m crazy, but this is what I feel.
And you weren’t rude. Honesty sometimes hurts, but I would be always honest, even if it’s cruel. 🙂I could say names, but only hungarian Youtubers will be there, so… I don’t really think you know any of them 😀 But they’re famous enough to make interviews with them for our webpage.
Today, I was thinking about my changes. I’ve realized two things.
My ex said the following at the break up: “I don’t know. Everything is changing. People are changing. You’re changing. I’m changing too. And feelings are changing…”. At the current state of my mind I did not really realized what did she say, but now… What the hell? I did not change at all during the relationship. Except the period right after our first meeting, when I was like “oh my god i have a girlfriend”, and some kind of euphoric feeling ruled over me. But in the next 6-7 months… Absolutely nothing. I stayed the same. So I don’t know why did she said that. But of course, it’s a huge problem that I haven’t changed. I thought I was in safe, and I don’t have to.
But looking at her… During the relationship, she changed. Not that much, but she changed. But I loved all these changes. I only changed some months before she came into my life. I had a really positive period in my life at that time (it was approximately more than 1 year ago), a lot of good things happened to me. And I was also in love, with the girl I’ve mentioned several times before. I knew that I was not good enough for her, so… I tried to win her attention, and I started to change. It’s funny. Last time I changed for her, and now she helps me to change 😀 It’s also funny that both of my two “big-changing-periods” were because of girls 😀 Of course, back in time, the good happenings motivated me to change, and now, it’s the role of the break up.
The other thing that came to my mind, is that I must always change. It’s not just a period when I have to, and I can’t finalize my changes – because I always have to change and improve myself somehow. Otherwise, whoever will be my next partner, she will find me boring after a time. And it’s not only true for partners.
And of course, it’s not only true for my situation, anyone can have the same issue, and everybody should improve himself as much as he can to give the very best, not boring himself to the special ones.Good luck to for the new week as well! 🙂
Mini update: I’ve just got a notification that I’m among the top 10 at a wtiting competiton.
I wrote that piece of new to the gruop chat. Everybody was like “oh my god :ooo, wow :ooo, so proud of you, congratulations, nice job ;))), etc. ” (There were 200 competitors at all so it is a relatively huge achievment).
My ex only worte: “congrats ”
I dont know what to say about that. She is still weird.
But the timing of this couldnt be better. One week before the film. An other thing that my ex can see 😀
What is more, she also competed, but she didn’t get notification.Yeah two but i can’t really meet up with them during the week and on the 18th i’m with my ex soooo unless are somehow able to meet up with me during the week even though there’s school and everything, i can’t really do anything with them.. ^^
IF me and my ex get back together i will have to stop the contact and if not well.. then we’d definetly be able to meet up on the following weekend 😛I have no idea what she has been doing or if she changed or anything.. i had absolutely no contact to her or any of her friends (except for the birthday talk i told you about).. so yeah.. it will be quite interesting to see her again on the one hand how she’ll act now that we are not together anymore and on the other hand to see if there is any difference in her hobbies and so on.
Personally, I’d advise you to try and get back together with her and if you are unhappy you can talk to her. 🙂
Oh okay.. i don’t know any hungarian Youtubers.. 😀
It’s good that you think about that but keep in mind that even during a relationship you have to change but not too much or the other person will wonder who you are and maybe won’t be in love with you anymore!
wow good job 🙂
but be aware that she might be envious now and we shouldn’t make our exes envious but i don’t think that’s such a huge deal. In a few days she’ll be really happy for you and as you said, she saw that you did really well which is great! 🙂-Andi
Sorry, I had absolutely no time today, so only a very short post is coming about some problems with my case. Anyway, tell me if something new happened to you! 🙂
So, I’ve noticed three bad news.
My ex is going to a concert tonight, with a boy – but he is not the boy she speaks about several times. Even when we were just friends, she mentioned that she has a lot of boy friends, so I can understand that, but meh… It’s a bad feeling tho.
The next one is not that bad, it could have been much worse: the filming was postponed again. Fortunately, this time only by one day, so it will be on 19th (mainly because of the weather).
The third bad piece of news are the huge amount of tasks. In the next one or two weeks I’ll have a lot of chapter tests at school and I will have to give a lot of presentations. These things will make my work harder, I’ll have less time for the video and for the interviews (for the writing competition not, writing is always the first, even when I have to learn a lot).Actually, as the date of the filming is getting closer, I’m worrying more about how my friends will welcome my changes. On the following weeks, at the filming and at the gamer event, I’ll meet with my closest friends. But I know that I can’t undo my changes, because if I did it, all those changes would be useless.
The girl that helped me a lot will be there both places. She will give me a lot of strength I think.Have a nice day… or evening… or morning… or whenever you’ll read that 😀 Anyway, I’m looking forward your update! 🙂
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