Boards Reconciliation Letting Go

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Viewing 15 posts - 16 through 30 (of 33 total)
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  • #24662
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    What do you suggest I do?

    #24678
    atea1234
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 944

    I suggest removing him as a friend on snap chat. It’s clouding you right now and you’re using it as a safety net and an outlet to talk to him/try to understand what he’s thinking. He hasn’t asked you for any help or told you he’s depressed. I would delete him off snapchat and try your hardest to avoid worrying about what he’s thinking and focus only on your thoughts. Only then will you be able to let go

    #24690
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    I still need time for me…as much as it pains me to say it. I hate that we’ll be broken up for almost 3 months soon. Maybe I just need to give up…

    #24695
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    I must be over thinking today. I just cried that the fact that we will be broken up for 3 months soon…I feel like I don’t have much time left. I need to stop thinking about him. And I just know he’s depressed or sad. I can tell just by what he said, I know how he is…most of the time.

    I just feel lost

    #24764
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    Am I just overthinking?

    #24767
    atea1234
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 944

    once again, no one can tell you if you’re overthinking. my situation is completely different from yours so i can’t say how to advise you more than i already have. my ex and i have 7 years of history together – thats a very long time. i think for us its necessary to have at least a 6 month break to evaluate everything. you and your ex were only together for 5 months. so I’m not sure what an appropriate amount of time is before considering reconciling. you’ve been broken up now for 3 months which is more than half of the relationship – for me, its been 3.5 months but that compared to 7 years is like nothing so we are dealing with very different situations. i also have gotten to the point where i feel like its my exes loss. i love him very much and hope he comes back, but i will certainly not initiate or chase him. he broke up with me and knows how to reach me if he wants to reconcile. until he does that, i focus on me and only me and making myself a better and happier person – not on “getting him back”. theres no way to “get back an ex”. they must come to you on their own for it to be successful and lasting. he broke up with you so whether or not he is depressed or sad is no longer you’re problem. he hasn’t asked to get back together and he hasn’t asked for your help with any of this. you need to let it go more. i don’t know what you mean by “giving up”. you should be working on yourself to make yourself happy and you should never give up doing that. its ok to have hope that one day you’ll reconcile, but improving yourself solely to get him back wont work. I’m not really sure what you’re looking for me to say here. i can’t say you will get him back or how long it will take. i can only say make yourself happy and maybe he will come back on his own

    #24873
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    I want to tell him I miss him…but that probably wouldn’t be good? I haven’t said it once since we broke up…what should I do? I just want us talking again

    #24874
    atea1234
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 944

    no you shouldn’t tell him you miss him

    #24882
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    Is it bad that I haven’t said it once and he’s said it…2 times?

    #24901
    atea1234
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 944

    no…it really doesnt mean anything whether or not you miss someone. pretty much everyone in the world will miss an ex at some point after a relationship ends no matter what the circumstances are. my ex has told me he loves me and misses me since the breakup but were still nowhere close to reconciling. it just makes things confusing and complicated to say. plus him saying he misses you in no way means he wants to get back together. you shouldn’t say it because it will make yo appear weak to him, less independent, and will set him back. plus its not even been two weeks nc. even if you decide to reach out at some point it should only be to make light, friendly, convo. you shouldn’t say i miss you unless there are talks of reconciling, initiated by him

    #25154
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    How do I possibly show him I’ve changed…back to me, the none depressed me

    #25155
    atea1234
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 944

    theres no real way. if you started talking and hanging out maybe he would see it over time

    #25160
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    That’s what I meant, like talking and all that

    #25414
    Confused_Girl
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 1218

    I don’t know what to do, I want him back so much

    #25418
    atea1234
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 944

    maybe you should just try telling him how you feel then and see what he says

Viewing 15 posts - 16 through 30 (of 33 total)
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