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I saw a thing that said ‘Stop checking up on people who don’t care about you. It’s draining’ and it made me feel sad but I don’t know why 🙁 When I do get in contact with my ex I hope that he still cares about me and wants to talk :(((
Aww we’re really in the same situation here! I got stressed out with college and expects to spend my free time with me while he wanted to spend more time with his friends. Well yes I was blinded by the truth too back then :/ And now I see things more clearly now, and it’s really not our faults for hoping that they want to see us too. You see the thing here is, remember all best moments we have with them? THEY WERE UNPLANNED. And like our case, when we make time to be with them, we are EXPECTING that they are that eager to be with us too. Things would be so much more different is it’s actually both of us wanting to see each other, at some point it may be true that they want to see us too but still.. it’s because it’s something planned and we go with expectations. :/ When you force something .. it just won’t go with the flow. So that’s why as time go out, minor problems start stacking up and further leading to this break up.. Don’t you think it’s so true? 🙁 I mean.. our relationship wasn’t always like this. It only happened due to some circumstances .
And that’s also a problem here, people change all the time as we expose to different environment. And we’re not the only one to blame. A relationship take a lot of effort to work. It’s not gonna work when someone tried too hard or when someone stopped trying .. and also when we tried but we’re doing it the wrong way.. And sometimes a brekaup really made a person realised all the mistakes that they won’t when they are still in the relationship. And they start to realise what are the things they should have done. The sad thing is, there’s no turning back.. time machine don’t exist. Sometime a breakup is just a part of growing up I guess. But that doesn’t necessary meant this is an official end to the relationship. Sometimes two people need to fall apart , to realised how much they need to fall back together. ( What I really believed it’s true ) But our ex bf won’t just suddenly appeared on our doorstep with flowers telling us they’re sorry and they can’t lose us.. bla bla ( Although I did wished it happened haha!) We need to take this time apart to really grow up ourselves. For now we need to not just show them, but show ourselves that we can live this life happily by ourselves. Like you said.. you wished you could just know if you should hold on or give up but the truth is there really isn’t an answer.
As a woman we need a man who knows how to respect us. And we don’t need their attention to prove our value. When we’re ‘too available’ for them they won’t freaking appreciate it in fact they just treat us like a doormat. (It hurts so bad for me as I was loving him too much and I didn’t realised I was loving him the wrong was) I really believed that your ex will text you back when you did and he may even text you soon. Just let time do the work dear. I’m sorry I know it must hurt that he blocked you.. but I’m 100% he’s doing this just to distract himself from negative thoughts. I believe that you both had an amazing relationship together. But for now, you both just need some growing up to do. 🙂 Things will get better soon dear <3 Oh and my ex did reply me you can check up on post!
Yeah that’s very true. I’m trying not to expect anything from him & just take everyday at a time. I got a good feeling today that he might have messaged me but my phone is flat and I don’t have my charger so I will have to wait! He probably hasn’t. Maybe I’m just feeling more positive in general. Even if he has contacted me, I can’t reply because I’m still in NC.
I was thinking about it a lot and I’m not sure it would work out. The only way it would is if my ex is willing to put in effort. Because it’s not going to be easy. I just hope that even if we don’t get back together, I will be able to have a good talk to him at New Year’s and get all my feelings out. That way, I will feel more content with moving on. And even then, I’ll still feel like we could be together in 10 years or something? Even if I go away, I just feel like the universe would push us back together some how???? That’s probably silly but that’s how I feel because I sincerely love him lots and it feels like he is my soul mate.
It does hurt that he has blocked me but I know that if we were friends then I would be checking his facebook constantly, which I think is part of the reason he did it. He knows what I’m like! I also don’t think he would’ve wanted to see happy memories because it would have just made him sad. I’m wondering if I should save the photos I found of us together? If we were still in relationship I would save them with no questions asked but since we’re not together anymore it feels kind of … stalker-ish to be saving photos of him 🙁 I’m not sure!
Oh yay! I’m so glad your ex replied! I knew that he would. I will go and check out your post now :))) Thank you so much by the way. Even just talking to you really helps me get through this process.Yeah I know we should just learn to see everything in a positive light. And it’s definitely easier to be said then done. Hey it’s actually a good sign that you have the feeling he will send you a message. Because in a way, you’re no longer seeing everything negatively and learned to think the positive way. 🙂
I sincerely hope that things will get better for you. I really don’t have any close friends that’s willing to hear me out in every detail in real life 🙁 Sometimes I just feel so so so alone in this world..but I remembered this forum, that we are all struggling but we have each other here. So I’m really glad that we can share our stories with each other, sharing insights and give each other motivation 🙂 I really do appreciate our virtual friendship here @scatteredtracks! Although its gonna be great if we are friends in real life because we know how it feels to be going through this.
It’s no use if we live on fake hopes.. so the thing is we may not get back with them after all. And today, I don’t know why I suddenly have that feeling that..he’s heart is not with me anymore. Maybe it’s just me and my thoughts but.. I just feel that we need to go NC for now and let time lead us to the right path. And maybe not now but one day we’ll be back together, stronger than ever. Maybe even raising a family together. I hope that you’ll get to talk to him soon! Have faith that either way everything will be alright. There’s no such thing that you two are not compatible enough to be together ..I just feel like at some point of our relationship with them, the relationship dynamic changed. It’s no longer as healthy as it used to be. We tried too hard and that made them pull away.. So basically there’s nothing we can do now to change their mind. 🙁 We can only learn to have hope that this storm will go away soon. We should start loving ourselves. And let them too, experience their life. Although I can’t accept the face that he’ll hold another girl’s hand..not yet :'( True love have a habit of coming back. If we’re meant to be then we’re meant to be but it may take several detours that may even last for months or even years. We may not see it but God has it all planned! 🙂
About the photos I feel it’s completely okay that you save them! But maybe you should save all your photos with him in a pendrive and delete it from your phone. That’s what I’m planning to do so I’ll heal faster. Because the old relationship is dead anyway but the beautiful memories remain.. 🙂
Hopefully I’m not thinking as negatively as I was. I still haven’t given up hope, I just hope it isn’t false hope. I’m trying not to over think anything too much anymore.
I really do think that my ex thought that he meant we could talk at New Year’s. It seemed like he had thought about it even before I had told him I still had feelings for him. I know that he wouldn’t say something if he didn’t truly believe it so I just have to keep thinking that it’ll work out, and hopefully it will. I also feel like I’m in a better frame of mind for if it doesn’t work out.
I’m really glad for our virtual friendship as well! I had told a few people online about my situation and kept trying to get advice off different people which just confused me more and more. In the end, I think these people got fed up of me telling them every little thing I was feeling so I’m really lucky these boards are here. I feel like if I didn’t express everything on here then I would either explode or cave and tell my ex everything!
I’m sad that you feel like your ex doesn’t have you in your heart anymore but it’s good that you can deal with it now. That’s the main reason for NC I think, it helps you deal with the fact that your ex isn’t part of your life anymore (and in good examples it makes them miss you and wonder where you are). I’m sure it’s really hard to let it go and I know that you will be together if you are meant to be. Good luck with your NC! I’ll be here to help you through it all.
I definitely love myself more than I did when I was in a relationship. Something that someone told me was when I’m in a situation like, my friend or even my ex hasn’t messaged me back or I feel like everything is hopeless, I just have to ask myself ‘Do I love myself enough to get through this?’ And usually I surprise myself with the answer and it helps me feel more strong.
The hope is still in my heart for me and my ex, but one day it might not be. One day I might truly be over him. But for now, I think I just have to hold on for a little while longer. At least until New Year’s. My only REAL worry is thinking that he may have found someone else :'( but no one has said anything, unless they’re trying to keep me from hurting but he said that he didn’t want to be in another relationship for a long time so I just have to trust him on that and hope for the best on that front.
I’m going to put all my photos onto a hard drive and just put them away for now. Maybe one day I will be able to look back at them and smile, instead of feeling sad that it’s over. I also have some polaroids of us together that are still up in my room, so I should really take them down.
He isn’t my first thought in the morning anymore. Sometimes I think about the fact that I have to go to work, or about something else and then I remember about the break up. When I remember in the morning I don’t feel too sad though. I just think ‘Oh yeah’ and eventually that will just be natural. That will be what my life is like. Hopefully!
The thing I wonder about is if in say, 2 years, if I’m STILL thinking about my ex, I’m not sure if I should contact him then? I’ve thought about writing a letter and then if I still want to send it, I will send it then. But by that time he may have changed address or his phone number so it’d be really difficult to get in touch. Hopefully, if I do something like that, it’ll just work out and I’ll let things progress naturally and not get to upset if he replies to me or not. I realize that’s very far in the future so I’ll just think about now and leave those thoughts to if/when they happen 🙂
That is what I believe. I believe in fate and everything. So even if you haven’t seen your ex in a few years, maybe you will run into them and everything will play out like a rom-com! haha. We never know what will happen. I think we just have to keep love in our hearts, whether its for our ex, for someone else, or for ourselves.The thing is.. I’m not okay with that thought of he’s not there anymore. Maybe it’s just me assuming the worst so that I don’t get hurt anymore. I just had a dream of gimme telling me he misses me so much but he said silent because he is afraid I’ve moved on. Lol it feels so real! Sometimes I wondered if he ever thought like that :'( Like maybe he really misses me too but he thought he’s doing this for our best. Because seriously we have been through TOO MUCH to just forget everything. I accidentally looked at the notes he wrote me years ago and it just bring tears to my eyes. He was so afraid of losing me back then.. I was just leaving for a vacation but he started to say he’ll miss me so much and cried in front of me :'( Argh.. where did that old him go? Where have all the times gone? How can he choose to forget everything that happened in 3.3 years? Because I can’t..
But sometimes I feel leaving all this at here is the best for us if we ever get to get back together. At least our memories remains, for both of us. The thing is, I don’t know if you read horoscope or not but for me, they are accurate in a lot of ways. Me and my ex are of the same horoscope, so I notice while we’re still together, there are lot of times we think the same way and basically we have a lot in common in every expect . I’m an extroverted introvet and so is him. He looked like he have a lot of friends but he doesn’t really have a one true friend. Except that he can deal better with loneliness than I do because he’s a guy. He told me before he thought that I won’t just agree to the break up. To show him he was wrong, I just walked away. During the first month he still send me snapchats and chat with me on random things. I did replied but I ignore him and thought I should stick to NC. Now I think back and thought if I have done the wrong thing .. Did I make him think that I moved on?
Yes I do believe that you and your ex will get to work things out on New Year’s either way. Like you said at least you know for sure that you will be in a better frame of mind. Don’t worry too much if your ex is gonna ne dating someone else or not..because we can’t control anything either we’ll only end up in more pain . Just have confidence that he won’t forget you. He’ll miss you too like you miss him. He’ll compare his current relationship with yours and miss the way you loved him. Because I believe you both had an awesome 2 years together. Don’t stick to too nuch rules.. Or else you’re only gonna regret the chances you didn’t take.
I was thinking if I should just confront him and talk about everything. Because I really miss him as my best friend. I don’t have anyone at all now. Except my family but it’s not the same. I just feel so alone in this world. Somehow I feel he’s feeling the same too but he thought I’ve moved on so don’t want to have false hope. He knew me the most and I do too . This distance, it hurts. At the same time I also thought that he maybe moved on himself and he only reply me out of respect ? I’m just so confused.
He did throw me signs that he miss me though.. there was this song that I asked him to hear when we first met up after the break up. Then he posted a photo and the caption are lyrics from that song. The chorus of that song is ‘ If you’re struggling like I am, can’t we get back together to make things easier? ‘ Was he indirectly telling me this? :/ But that was a month ago anyway .. If you like to hear that song I’ll be glad tp share with you but it’s a Korean song which I don’t understand too but I looked at the english translation.
Anyway for your case I feel sticking on NC is the best bet. 🙂 Who knows he may start to miss you and text you too. And yeah we should continue to love ourselves more for now. Because no one else will love us as much as we can ourselves. I haven’t save all our pictures up I guess I should already ! Good luck in your work and hope to hear your reply soon! 🙂
Aww, you should never assume anything. I think that, once your ready, it will be a good idea to talk to your ex and see how he is feeling. That is the only way you will ever know. I feel like my ex is doing the same. He feels like it is best for us to be away from each other right now, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t care about me anymore or that he won’t love me again in the future. You never know what someone is truly thinking unless you ask. I haven’t looked at notes or messages or anything because I know that they’ll make me cry so much and I’ll probably break NC!
My ex and I have the same horoscope as well!! This is getting scary how similar our situations are haha. I don’t read them, but I have thought about it. I’m feeling like it might be best to leave my feelings and memories here as well. Then if I ever see my ex in the future things could work out naturally. I just don’t know though. I guess he did say that he would talk to me at New Year’s. so I’ve gotta do that at least.
I think you did the right thing not replying to him at the beginning because it showed him that you WERE moving on and you were growing up to become a different person. Developing into someone that he wouldn’t want to break up with. I hope that makes sense? I’m sure he would have wondered where you had gone. But that’s a good thing!
That’s very true. Even if my ex is with someone else that doesn’t mean that he will automatically forget the time we spent together. I’m really sad because he doesn’t own any photos of us together 🙁 He doesn’t have a camera and he used to update his phone all the time which would wipe the memory. I didn’t really mind at the time but it seems sad now that there will nothing to remind him of how we looked together. I have lots of photos and polaroids of us together.
I wanted to write my ex a letter. I don’t know if I’ll send it but at least I’ll get all my feelings out. Then I can give it to him if I see him in October or New Year’s and reaffirm things that I’m going to talk to him about.
I can’t say for sure if your ex is just replying out of respect or not. But I think it’s a good idea to ask him how he feels. I would use the text / phone call templates that are in Ryan’s Relationship Rewind? That way you can reestablish a connection, meet up with him as friends and then on the third date you get him alone and tell him how you feel. I don’t know how well this works because I haven’t done it myself (as I told my ex of my feelings the first time I saw him again) and maybe that won’t work for you but I just thought it’d be worth mentioning? For ideas on what to say etc.
Aw that’s sounds like a really cute song. He might have been reaching out to you. I guess you won’t know unless you ask him. I wish I could see what my ex is putting on facebook 🙁 He deleted it for a day (my friend told me) and then when he was back this girl that I really don’t like asked him why and he said that he was in a dark place. But my friend said it sounded like he was joking :/ which really upset me because i AM in a dark place!! Ugh.
I’m really hoping that he’s missing me. I have no idea what he’s been up to lately and it kills me. He has probably been out partying every weekend. Normally I’m at home on the weekends because I have work D: I don’t really have anyone else to hang out with. Especially as my sister is living to college soon, which is going to be really tough.
Good luck if you ask your ex how he feels. I believe in you!Yeah I agree on that! But for now I just feel that I still have some growing to go. I want to learn to be more independent and do things that show to myself that I am worth it. I have an exam going on so for now I just want to focus on my studies 🙂 Although sometimes I still have that thought that ‘How nice would it be if he’s here and going through everything with me?’ I guess sometimes we just have to see it as.. an opportunity to grow up. Because we aree born into this world alone anyway. And if it’s true love , the bonds don’t break easily.. maybe they’ll connect again further down the line.
Ohh wow! It’s really abit creepy that our situations are similar in so many ways here! 🙂 Mind if I ask what sign are you? I’m a gemini haha! Anyway I read something somewhere today and I feel it’s very applicable to our situations. They said that reconciliation will likely be possible for our case. Because the relationship was going well all along , both party were really getting along well until some life changes come along in one or both of our lives. Because of work (for your case) and studies (for my case) we grew dependent and clingy towards the end. It was due to certain life circumstances. The problem is – attraction.
I guess by keep wanting to spend time with them and subconsciously depended on them for our happiness, our relationship dynamics with them is altered. It take two people working together to build a healthy relationship. But when we started to reach out more, we’re in a way chasing them and turn out, they stopped trying instead. And something that has been on the universe since the early times are truer than ever. My grandma always told me – guys need to make the chase, girls need to play hard to get, but it take time to learn the right way. I don’t get it when I was young, now I finally realise. It doesn’t mean we have to act like a spoiled brat or have princess attitude. But our boyfriends need to appreciate our value, like how they used to see us when they’re chasing us. I hope that all these did help you abit on having a clearer view! 🙂
Aww that’s sad that he don’t have any pics of you both together.. But I bet you’re still on his mind babe! Some memories don’t just fade away. The beautiful ones will always remain no matter how much he want to distract himself from everything now. I was the one having more of our pics too. I remembered editing and printing out photos of us and he’ll always put them in his wallet, which was also his bday gift from me . I wonder if he removed all of it 🙁 But one thing I’m sure is he’s still keeping them somewhere.. in his drawer maybe. My ex just changed a new phone not along ago and I was there accompanying him when he got it, that night he transferred all our photos in his phone.. maybe he deleted it now but.. I hope he still keep it somewhere like I’ve planned to put it in a pendrive!
I honestly feel like your ex is struggling too.. from the way he deleted his fb? He seems like he’s just trying to avoid. It’s just that guys hate to be vulnerable , it’s just their instinct. That’s why even thought their suffering they still keep things to themselves instead of rumbling or seeking advice from someone else.
I chatted with my ex abit last night. I wished him take care as he’s heading to another city to send off his brother to UK. I sent him a link to a funny video which was off a boy band we both liked very much. He was online but he didn’t reply me. It was late at night – 4 am. So I thought I guess I was talking too much and he felt annoyed. But I didn’t bother much because I was just genuinely thought that he would find it funny too. The next (early) morning he replied with ‘ ohh okay!’ And I felt relieved as .. at least he make an effort to reply me. After half a day, I sent him a smiley, which he immediately send back a wink. LOL. Now I’m a bit confused. But I guess it just mean that he felt okay talking to me, and he wasn’t trying to avoid me in any way. I’ll just go NC for now and see how it goes! Not planning to talk about US yet though..
Hope you’re doing better today @scatteredtracks! :* And yeah same here! I don’t have anyone to hangout with either :/ When is your sis leaving? 🙁 Don’t worry I’ll still be always here to be there for you!
Yeah that’s right. I think you should talk to him when you feel ready. I’ve though about doing just that as well. Like… Maybe I won’t talk to him for a few years just so I can grow and figure out what I’m doing. If it’s true love I don’t think he’ll forget about me but then again maybe he will. I guess I should talk to him at New Year’s though… I’m just scared I’m going to cry the entire time.
I’m an aries… although I definitely don’t feel like one. Idk I just don’t fit a lot of the aspects of that sign :/ but nevermind. I hope that what you read was right. Although I can’t say that my relationship was 100% fine. I was always pretty clingy, it just got a lot worse. And we had a lot of ups and downs but in the end the good times were a hell of a lot better than the bad times and I just hope he is remembering them while I’m not contacting him.
Yeah that makes sense. I’ve read that sort of thing before. And it’s really cute at the beginning of a relationship when they’re trying to impress you. My ex thought he was going to be a really bad boyfriend! But he was amazing and sometimes I wasn’t very grateful for that.
I guess my memories haven’t faded and I haven’t been looking at any pictures either (because that would make me too sad). My ex had a couple of little love notes / letters that I gave him. I tried to get them to me when I went to get all my stuff from his house. I said they’re yours… just throw them out or whatever. But he said no no and just put them down on the bed.
Yeah I kinda thought he was struggling adn the fact that he said that made me feel worried about him. But then my friend said that it seemed like he was joking so I was pretty annoyed about that because I am in a dark place and he probably knows that. He’s definitely not one to show his emotions (even when we were together) so it is strange that he even said something like that… he could’ve just said that it was an accident or something to protect his feelings if that was how he actually felt but idk for sure. Maybe he wasn’t joking and was actually feeling sad..I’ll never know. My sister has seen him in the supermarket and things a few times and said that he looks pretty happy, but he has always been high :/ I haven’t seen him around town because I avoid going anywhere when I know he might be there. I shop for food during the day instead of going there at night when he could be there after work. I’d like to run into him but I’m not sure how I’d react. I’d probably be really sad :/ Also, you’re not supposed to go anywhere they may be during NC.
Aw at least he replied to you in the morning. I’m sure he was just tired the night before. But good luck with your NC for now! Hopefully he’ll end up messaging you :’)
My sister is leaving in a few months in December or during the New Year. That kinda sucks because that’s when I’ll be talking to my ex and I want her around for that time! Thank you!! I’ll always be here for you too. Even if it’s only virtual, it’s better than nothing <3Yeah most of the times of our relationship we were really happy together too, the bad times are only less than a quarter of it… I really hoped that he will remembered how much he used to love me though :’) But I’d always showed him that I appreciated everything he’d done for me, maybe I even expressed too much towards the end. Because that’s one of my darkest period of our life, I was stressed out and depressed. But because I cling on to him too much… he just want to get away instead :/
I don’t know but sometimes I still feel that it’s not completely hopeless.. we were each other’s soul mates. We knew each other so well. I agree that I was not acting like myself instead I feel like an over-possessive gf a few months back. But argh.. I was struggling and he was my closest person on Earth .. how can I not depend on him ? So I guess from now on I still need to work on myself, as I still can’t stand being alone. The silence is killing me. It was not always like that.. I used to be a very cheerful and outgoing person, stress turned me into someone else..
Awww I hope they’ll keep the letters we wrote them :/ Let’s not worry too much about what they feel shall we? Because it’s not like we can control anything anyway. We only can control what we want to do for ourselves. Because we deserve to be happy. Life is too short to dwell in the past, but memories act like a drug pulling us back every time 🙁 We have to treat it like our old relationship is dead and think it as dating them again, it may take some time but hopefully, we’ll move on far enough to adapt this mindset.
Oh no.. sucks that your sister is leaving at the time! 🙁 But don’t worry I’ll still be here to hear your story , always! 🙂 I hope that by New Years I’ll make great progress too. I actually hope that I can spend Christmas and New Years with him. Last year I went on vacation with his family during New Years.. How can he not miss all our moments?! :'( I’m terrified of whether should I talk to be him about my feelings? Like for instance, at least it seems like there’s still hope now. But the key is since they are the ones to initiate the break up, if we get rejected again won’t it seem like we’re getting treated like a doormat? D: I read online they teach that the key is to get in touch with their emotional side and not the logical side, that means no direct talking about getting back together unless both parties are putting equal effort to save the relationship. But I really want to ask him, if he really choose to move on, would he be very happy if he suddenly saw me in a another’s man arms and giving all my attention as I used to give him? :/ Sometimes you only regret the chances you didn’t take..
I sometimes feel like I wasn’t appreciative enough for everything that my ex did. I really don’t think you can be too thankful, so don’t worry about that! I had depression for my entire relationship but I had learnt to control it some what. For some reason, everything came crashing down a couple of months before he broke up with me. I guess because I had been feeling lonely and had just started my new job, meaning I got to spend less time with him. Unfortunately he had just moved house and I was going to be moving in, but at that stage I couldn’t afford to live with him 🙁 He really wanted me to move in and didn’t mind that I couldn’t pay for rent or anything. He just wanted me to live there as well, but I felt that wasn’t fair on him since he would be paying all the bills. Now I wish with all my heart that I had just moved in with him anyway. That way I wouldn’t have missed him so much when he went away with his friends on the weekends because I would have seen him during the week.
I believe me and my ex are soul mates as well. He even told me this at one stage. Before I met him I wasn’t even sure that I believed in soul mates. But now I do, and being apart from mine is so difficult and sad. It’s quite scary thinking that we may never be together again. Although I like to believe we will be, I will never know unless it happens. I know what you mean about the silence 🙁 I wish my ex would talk to me finally!! But at least we have each other.
Yeah that’s a good idea. There’s no use guessing what they are thinking and feeling. Instead we should focus on what we’re thinking and feeling and learn to live by ourselves. I think I’m getting a little bit better although I’m going to see a councilor tomorrow just because I think it will help a bit more to talk about everything again. Maybe help with my growing.
I know what you mean. I’m so scared to bring up my feelings with my ex. Because he may just say no and it’ll feel like all the progress I made was for nothing. Idk. I guess because I have a ‘deadline’ to talk to him about things makes it better because I know he will be willing to sit down and hear me out. He wouldn’t have said anything if he wasn’t willing to talk to me at that time. I don’t think my ex would be happy to see me with someone else. But I don’t want to be with someone else. Maybe not ever. And it’s a huge risk to– Sorry I just realized I hadn’t finished my reply?
It’s a huge risk to be with someone to make your ex jealous. That’s just not fair!! I feel like even if my ex was with someone else, I really don’t think I could be in another relationship while I’m still in love with him.
‘Sometimes you only regret the risks you don’t take’ I agree. That’s why I told my ex how I felt about him almost straight after No Contact. But nevermind. Now I have all the time in the world to make myself feel better and learn to live without him.Sometimes we get disappointed because we hoped and expected too much. :/ The fact is.. they are not the only ones responsible for our happiness. And doing our tough times, we depended too much of them for that. It just led them into a lot of pressure and well.. things started to fall apart then 🙁
I know I know it just feel so right to be together.. why don’t they see it like we do?? :/ It’s really not easy finding someone who has the same heart as you and building everything together and connect in so many ways. I always believed everything can be fixed and nothing is worse than losing each other but I guess at that moment when they broke up with us, they just don’t see it that way. We should really just appreciate this time apart and be our better self but it’s just so hard sometimes it just feels clueless on which direction to head to. And like you’ve said it’s good that you have a ‘deadline’ actually because yeah like you’ve mentioned , at least you two can talk about things and either way you’ll finally be moving on to the right direction. For me I’ll just let things go with the flow I guess.
How did the trip the councillor go ? 🙂 Did he/she give you some helpful advice? I haven’t contacted my ex today and he didn’t too. I didn’t get to wish his brother though.. but it’s okay what is done is done :/ I’ll go NC for a bit and plan ahead! 😀
I know that I definitely relied on my ex too much for my happiness when it really wasn’t up to him. He did things because he thought I would be happy and he should have just done things to make himself happy. I really appreciate everything that he did for me and I hope that I made him half as happy as I made him.
I’m still hoping it’ll be okay. And that if it’s meant to be then it will be. If I’m still thinking of him in a couple of years, I may try and get in contact again. Idk.
Yeah it must be hard to not know what to do. I still feel directionless sometimes and don’t know whether I’m doing the right thing going through no contact or if I should hang out with him etcetc. And I don’t know if I’m working on myself enough or anything. But I guess we both have to take things day by day and not think too much about the future.
My trip to the councillor wasn’t too bad. They basically just helped me realize that I have to work on myself because it’s my life and I need to be happy whether I’m back with my ex or not. Then I was in the city with my family and I saw one of his good girl-friends who I have supsected has slept with him or is in a relationship with him. Before my first no contact I asked him about her and he said that he would never be with her because she’s crazy (which is a bit mean but I don’t mind because I don’t like her at all haha). So I kinda just have to take his word for it. When I saw her I felt really, really angry and like I was going to throw up. It was definitely a shock. I’m wondering if she text him to say that she saw me :/ I really hope she doesn’t mention me or if she does, it makes him miss me. I wanted to text him a silly remark about seeing his ‘charming new girlfriend’ but that wouldn’t go done well and I’m still doing no contact. Now is not the time to start throwing accusations and assuming things.
After we had left the restaurant where I saw his friend, my family went food shopping so I stayed in the car with my dog and just thought about things. I was sad but mostly I just missed him sooo much and wanted to remind him of some good times that we had. It was really tough and I really miss him but idk I still feel like there’s still a connection between us and there always will be. I know you feel the same about your ex and I really hope that you find a direction to keep you moving forward <3 good luck with no contact.
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