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Background
(I posted it on my second round NC post)My ex is 27 and I am 25. We had a serious 8 year relationship. On Nov 29 last year we loss our baby girl during birth. We had a hard time accepting her death. On top of it he lost his job and we had financial difficulties. His mind stopped thinking I guess and he decided being single was much better. He ran from our problems. On March 1 on my birthday he decided to break everything off. It has been hard but thank God I can say Im happy by myself. I love the life I have now.
On April we started talking after Not contacting eachother for a month. We met in a hotel. We kept in contact. He was still not into getting back. Again we spent the night together. I decided after it that I would do NC again. So I did and 42 days after he reached out just to seek for friendship. I again was hurt so I told him I will seek for happiness with someone else and please don’t search for me again. I blocked him for a month. During that time he had his friends call me but i never picked up. So thursday I was fed up by his friends. I unblocked my ex and asked him to tell his friends to stop calling. My ex answered asking how I was? And all that. He insisted on my reply because I ignored him. I said I was fine. My mom told me to stop ignoring and stay friends because we shared the same loss.
Here is my situation. My ex has been initiating contact daily. He is texting about past moments and how happy we were. That Im a beautiful good woman. The other night I told him our conversations are weird and he said why? I said because the past is the past. He said ok, but is still reminding me of our happiness and places we enjoyed together. Today I was doing laundry and he started reminding me of our past.
I believe in second chances but I don’t want to make the same mistakes. I didn’t say it over here on this post but his family did me wrong in our break up. His mother I don’t want to think about and his brother disrespected me. When I think about his family my mind starts going crazy. I don’t want anything to do with them. How can I forgive and forget?
It has been 5 months and I forgave my ex but not his family. Anyways should I just move on or give him another chance? Because Im sure he wants another chance.
Hey,
Its your decision to make and nobody else can make it for you but I think 5 months of break out of 8 years of relationship is ok. You guys went through ups and downs but overall, your relationship was a good one.I think what happened with you guys was really heart breaking but could happen to anyone and now that you both are healed and if YOU still do have feelings for him,I think its worth it to give it another try.
If you decide to give him another chance, take everything slow,show him the new you and let him say that he wants you back.
About his family, let him know that you’re still hurt. You guys can talk and find a way to deal with it.
Thanks az and maria. Im definitely taking it step by step. I’m treating him like a friend but I’m afraid of what he will say next. I’m not ready for it because I never expected this.
5 months is a short time to forget the love of 8 years. Yes I still love him.I will let him take initiative in everything. Let’s see how far he goes.
He began a conversation again. I don’t think he wants just a friendship like I thought. No man will reach out daily to the same friend unless he wants something more. Like I said I will just answer like a friend.
I never saw myself in this type of situation. Once I broke up with somebody that was it. I also got another relationship quick and maybe they were rebounds and thats why it didn’t work. Anyways I never went back to an ex. Like they say there’s always a first time.
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