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Hey everyone ..
I want to share my story with you …
3 monthes ago .. I met this amazing guy .. And he asked me out .. And I agreed .. We started dating .. And everything was perfect .. He introduced me to his sister .. His friends .. And thongs were going amazing ..
But ..
Here’s what happened ..
On our first date .. I asked him to take things slow .. “He was very happy that we started dating .. He had a crush on me one month before he had the courage to ask me out .. So he wanted to make our relationship official .. Which is a good thing in my country ”
So .. I told him that I need time to know him better …
So .. This guy Is the CEO of a company here .. And he’s really busy all the time ..
So at the beginning .. He used to turn off his cell phone when we’re together .. So later I told him that it’s ok for me of he answered it when we are together .. And that we should find a way to work things out between me and his work .. He agreed ..
Later .. He was behind the schedule for his work .. He was alomst fired .. He had to go out of town for a week .. And I wasn’t ok with that .. I started to feel like there’s a distance between us ..
So .. As soon as he get back .. We went on a date .. And I told him what i felt .. He told me that I’m crazy .. And he’s in love with me .. We had a little argument “our first one ” and i told him that it’s ok .. And that we are only getting to know each other.. Then he had to go to a meeting .. So we agreed to talk about what happened later .. But he asked me if I want to take a break .. I told him no .. He told me that he’s happy for this .. And he was afraid that i was going to say yes ..
Next morning .. He told me that he needed a break because he’s really stressed at work .. And he had a big meeting with our first lady later that week .. I was ok with that .. And wished him good luck ..
So .. Every day I used to talk to him on the phone for 2 minutes max .. To check on him ..
He was out of town for 10 days .. And we barel talked .. When he was back .. He called me and asked me out for a movie ..I said ok .. During the movie .. He wasn’t happy and he checked he’s phone every 5 minutes “he told me he was waitng for a call ” ..
At last .. I couldn’t take it any more .. And told him that there’s something wrong between us and that he had changed ..
He told me that there is a problem and he was running from it because he is still stressed at work .. And that he changed because I told him on our fight that we’re only getting to know each other .. Which he took it as if I don’t considere him as my boyfriend “i never told him that i love him .. But we spent Valentin day together ” .. And he was waiting for me to do something after our first fight “I was really childish .. It was mostly my fault ”
So .. He told me as a joke that he’s thinking of taking a break from us ..so I told him to do whatever he wants .. He got really mad .. And shoked from my arespond And he told me to go home ..
Next day .. He called me .. And told me that we should take a break .. To get to know each other better ..and that he wants us to stay friends for now .. And .. I agreed ..
But .. It’s been a week now .. And he never called 🙁
So that’s my story .. What do you think?
And what should I do?It’s a little difficult to get the full picture because I don’t think your English is the best. It seems like there is a lot of miscommunication based on expectations. Without knowing the etiquette of your country, it is tough to give any advice.
Normally, I would say ask him back out and just have fun on the date. If it goes well and things are progressing then you have the opportunity to be honest and upfront. Be clear about what you want and how you want things to progress. It should be very easy for him to say what he feels back.
If he spent Valentine’s Day with you, he’s into you so that is a good sign.
I think you should just give him space. Maybe he is still very upset on how things ended.
And just try to do the NC rule and see from there.Thanx @will0124 .. I apologise for my English ..
Well , there’s a big misunderstanding between me and my ex .. But I don’t know if I should talk to him .. Or wait for him to calm down and do NC for awhile …
I mean ..do you think Am at shift or drift stage in my relation? “From relationship rewind book”
I really want to clear things out between us .. But I don’t want him to think that I’m needy or clingy ..@Mee thanx alot for ur opinion ..
It’s been 2 weeks now ..
Do you think I should wait for a whole month?I think you should wait a bit more for him to calm down. But it’s really up to you if you think you’re ready to talk to him. And clear the misunderstanding
***UPDATE***
Well .. yesterday .. I talked to my ex .. and tried to understand what happened. .
So he told me that there is no specific reason .. it’s just little things that made him distance from me ..
He told me that he feels like we are from two different planets .. and that he thought too much about our relationship before making this decision ..
He told me that alot of things went wrong ..
And that our relationship was turning to something unpleasantful for him .. and he was wasting alot of time in solving our issues. . And that he was more happy in the break he took from me than when he was with me ..
He said that he didn’t like to talk about the problems. . And I should know that there is something wrong all by myself. .
He told me that it’s better to be just friends ..
So .. what do you think???? 🙁I’m sorry to hear that he thinks that way. I’m actually in a similar situation. Mine just wants to be friends and nothing more. I haven’t contact him for almost two weeks hoping things we still workout between us. But honestly i lost hope I feel he won’t change his mind about being friends ?
I’m still doing the nc rule. Even though I don’t think there’s hope. I just need to do it for me.Do the nc rule, do a few changes (positive) And just see from there.
Sorry if this isn’t helping like I said I’m in a similar situation and I myself don’t know what to do anymore.
Hey @Mee
Thanx for your reply ..
I’m losing hope too about my story.. he seems really determined to end things 🙁
Even that I think we are perfect for each other .. but I never show that to him ..
Anyway .. I’m not doing nc .. I’m following the relationship rewind book that kevin talked about in his emails ..
And I’m planning to do a false friendship.. I don’t know if this will work .. but it’s my best chance ..
Maybe you should do the same?We did keep in contact and we talked everyday all day for the whole month of February and a bit of March. i saw no improvement I think it was because I would always bring up if he still loved me and all that. And last time I asked him he said he still love me has before but not as much. That really hurt me and I just couldn’t reply. I just can’t do the fake friendship.
But maybe it’ll work for you
Here’s the thing about your situation. You are letting him adjust to a life that doesnt have you in his plans. Why the suffering. Have you seen the bad questions to ask your ex? “Do you still love me?” They will answer the same thing. Why? Because we haven’t projected self value yet. Try to become a better version of you first. Don’t get me wrong everyone is perfect in everyway. But we that extra edge to become more desirable.
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