HELP ME!!

First of all I think it is good idea at this point to give him space. You have contacted him now so just let him be once the 30 days is gone and wait bit longer. Let him show you he is ready and he wants you. You see what you just did I wrote I dont believe you have a chance IF YOU GET BACK TOGETHER RIGHT NOW NOT FOREVER. But you latched on the part where I said no chance in hell if you get back together right now. You totally skipped the reasons or the word NOW and got yourself thinking we have no chance ever just like I wrote. No one knows about forever no one knows future. Reason why I said it would not work NOW is that you are not there neither of you in your personal development. I did not say forever or anything like that I just said that the issues you both still need to work on are there at this moment and if you get back together I would within couple of months you would be back exactly where before and broke up again. I know you want to contact him but if you really want him back that show of controlling him needs to stop. Do you still have a chance we dont know because it depends on his ability to work past the negative feelings and his anger so only person who can answer that is him not anyone in here we cannot give you that guarantee and neither can your friends. I think your Roomie could be bit frustrated because trying to support you in your hour of need you ask everyday same question that she does not have an answer. Personally I think there is very good chance he will come back to you but my wish for you is that you are in better place to have that fulfilling relationship. I said trust in yourself if your heart and gut says he will come back then trust on that, put this aside and continue the work on you.

Yes, have you also noticed that every time you slip it happens when Finntoga is sleeping so what is that your late evening time? You are strong in the mornings and during the day but what the heck happens in the evening? And it is for that you need the distractions for. I read this great book called the world beyond your head and it helped me with my concentration of my thoughts so maybe you should try that one as well. But regardless you need to work on getting some distractions instead of just sitting in your room on your computer and your phone and going I love him, I want him now, we belong together… He has to come back to me because I love him so much…checking the websites (school site, instagram) thinking about his phone…Wondering will he come back and then boom text him. Am I correct or completely off? So work on having things ready look at things that interest you that you want to do…Think about what actions do you need to change in your daily life so that you dont have so much time and space o obsess about him and regards you roomie do you just talk about your ex or do you actually talk about what is going on with her so instead of bringing constantly your ex up with people try talking about other things too because it sounds bit like you dominate the conversations with this topic like with that guy who is your friend. I hope I am wrong?.Not to say it is important to talk about it but not like constantly except here in this forum because that what this is for but just so that you dont unintentionally damage your other relationships.
Just pointing that out because it is easy to see that when you get on subject you go over and over again and I think you kinda made really important self realization about it earlier in your posts as well so good on you for that. You seem to make lots of those and that is great. Just also get them to be the action and then it is fantastic : ).

@Dragongirl good question. The answer will tell a lot abut where Brokenhearted truly is with this situation.

Oh Brokenhearted, just as I guessed the answer showed where you are with this situation. You still have plenty of work to do because all though you are smart girl and you get this advice we (people here) give you still lack actually applying it. The two things you latched on in Dragongirls post was the sex and the Linkedin viewing. And this where the problem is. She is not saying that is the case she is saying what if and you instantly go into when someone poses a scenario you dont like, you get upset and anxious.
The problem is you dont know what he is like now that you are broken up and he is not with you because this is clearly not like the last time. You dont know how he feels when he is single and that is what he is. You have no control over it and it is none of your business as harsh and mean that sounds to you and much as you want to say to me and Dragongirl that dont say something like that but we do for your good in mind not to hurt and you cannot tell us what to do or say now if you dont want to hear what we have to say that is a different story all you have to do is tell us not to respond to you and I for one will stop because I am only mailing you now to try to help you because I think you have every chance to both become strong independent you and to get him back when you are ready to be in a relationship that is mature and adult relationship. It is completely valid point from Dragongirl to ask would you be able to accept because that is a possibility . And you cannot compare a situation where you are dating and where he is single, because those are completely different situations. When he was with you I believe he was honest and straight forward and did not cheat on you everything you say about that is right but the situation is different and that is the point that Dragongirl is trying to make you see and understand and more importantly to accept .That is this is different situation and he can do that, no one is saying he did that but again you just jumped because it was not an thought that you are willing to consider. It also shows you still do have him on a pedestal, you think that you can get him back now and that you are not willing to accept with his flaws and all like you stated in the previous mails nor the fact that the control of the future of your relationship right now lays in his hands and reason he has not contacted you is he is not ready. And this is where your inexperience with relationship shows. It is not a bad thing nor negative thing we all have to learn from somewhere , we all have been that in one point so dont take this as I am criticizing you because I am not this has happened to many of us in some point of our lives. But you need to think of also that option because if you refuse the face all eventualities then how would you react if he contacts you, you guys get back together and then you find out that he did in fact slept with someone. This is where relationship skills come to play, can you forgive the other person when they hurt your feelings and this will happen even wheny ou have a happy relationship, are you able to talk about it rationally without making it into an argument? Those are questions what you need to be able to answer.
Men are not like us they can sleep with someone when he is not in relationship without it having to mean anything to him and that could be a scenario you might need accept if you want to be with him. Of course assuming that would happen and I am not saying it does but he needs to figure out in his way is his love for you stronger than those negative memories and that could include anything that he needs to do work on his feelings about it. You need to figure out what are you willing to accept and that is why you need to think of scenarios that you dont like as well. And I say think not obsess and assume they are happening. But that is just it, if you get upset every time someone says something that you dont like you are not really moving forward of relinquishing the power battle between you. Second thing is listening to everything that people say, now you defended your stance on both Linkedin and this sex thing which was good but you got upset by completely valid if question. If you believe in what you say than stick with it what others say cannot harm you unless you let it. So it is because it is your fear that he moves on to someone else that is talking behind it rather than your believe and trust in him and your relationship. He knew what your stance is in sex before marriage and he has respected it so when he is in relationship with you he will respect and you need to be able to trust him, trust that and not jump on someone just because they said something. If that happens in every thing you will have a hard time with all your relationships. People say lots of things and this is where filtering and listening to yourself comes to play.

What Dragongirl wanted you to do is to think about it as possible scenario so that what ever happens in future (and none of us know, keep that in mind and dont get upset nor scared) with your relationship with your ex you are prepared for everything and you will be strong and fine no matter what it is get back together or not.