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Hello everyone,
I guess I am just looking for some general advice and/or opinions about my situation.
My ex and I broke up about 2 weeks ago, he said he wanted to be single to focus on himself. He wanted to be alone so he could pay more attention to school, working out, basically bettering himself. He wants to get the rest of his life together before he can add a relationship to it.. (We are in university for challenging programs). He didn’t do as well as he would have liked to this passing year, and said he is not succeeding with me.. He thinks that we are very different, but we are really only different in the matter that he likes video games and I do not, but we both share similar life long goals.
I’ll admit I did a bit of begging for our relationship in the beginning, and it did not help. I have been doing no contact for a week now, and he has not messaged me at all.Just wondering if anyone has been in a situation like this and is it possible to salvage our relationship? All advice will be gladly appreciated, thanks so much for reading.
Hi Ashley,
How long have you two been together? Are both of you Computer Science majors? If he plays lots of video games, it’s an easy way to distract himself so that he doesn’t have to think about you. Your breakup situation is similar to mine, I was playing so much video games that I suggested break up because I wasn’t focusing on my goals. I asked my ex why she wanted to be with someone that always plays video games. I felt like I wasn’t giving my ex nearly as much attention that I should have. After break up, I immediately wanted her back and did all the deadly mistakes mentioned in the guide.
If you two have been together long enough, it won’t be easy to forget you. Hopefully, he will realize that he’s lost someone precious. I would advise you to continue NC so that he has time to recognize this. You should continue your goals and don’t wait for him. Let him figure out his path and you’ll know when he chooses you. If he chooses to play video games or be with someone else, you should know that you deserve someone better.
We were together for a little over a year, and he is in computer science and I am in Nursing. I am planning to do the NC for the 30 days, and hoping in this time he does miss me.. We are not breaking up due to his video games (that is just one of his interests that I don’t share) but more so because he doesn’t feel he really has time for a relationship right, and that it will be easier to do better if he is alone.
Is this a common thing for guys? I am really hoping that it is just a phase, and in time I can show him that he can be successful with me..A relationship takes two to work, both people have to put effort for it to work. If he doesn’t have time for a relationship, you have to find out why. It’s not fair for you if you get back with him and he thinks the same again and leave you again. Breakups happen for a reason, either you get back or you don’t, either you learn from your mistakes or you let it be. I’m assuming that you two broke up because you two are too comfortable in the end of the relationship and after he left, you feel heart broken correct?
I dont think we broke up because we were comfortable. He got sick for a couple months and his grades suffered as well as everything else in his life, and then he became very distant. However before this we were really good. I do feel heart broken that he is gone, and I know I don’t need him to be happy, I can be on my own, he is just what I want.
hey,
follow the plan,you should give him some time and space,and also you need some time to heal from the breakup,the most important part of NC is about you.you should make positive changes in your life and be happy and confident again.this way,you can impress him more.don’t worry if you acted kinda needy,he will forget about that during NC.and yes you do have a chance.
Good luckHey everyone,
So my ex actually initiated contact withe me. A friend of mine added him of facebook so he messaged me too tell me.. Which I thought was weird, like maybe he just wanted an excuse to talk to me? Anyways, I ended up asking him to meet up and he said he wanted too. Then the day comes and I text him what time would be best and he doesn’t reply. I only sent the one message but I know he saw it because he was on Facebook around the time I messaged him. Im just wondering what does this mean and what do I do now? I don’t want to come off needy and message him again, but I would like to see him.hey,
I think you never completed NC.and i think you shouldn’t have asked him out like that right after he contacted you.I suggest you to restart NC at least wait until he contact you and don’t be too much available.he doesn’t have to be sure that you want him back.Here’s a checklist for ending no contact.
-You followed the no contact rule for at least one month.
-You are no longer a mess as you were after the breakup.
-You have made a few positive changes in your life.
-You are absolutely sure that getting back with your ex is a good decision.
-You have gone on at least one date during no contact.
-You have accepted the breakup and you are OK with the fact that you may never get your ex back and this might never work for you.
-You have accepted the fact that even if you don’t get your ex back, you will be fine since there are endless opportunities in the world to find love and happiness.The most important part of NC is about you not him.then you can get everything in control.
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