Childhood best friend then gf & now ex

Hi Kev,

firstly thanks for being available to reply to similar posts and helping ppl like me to read and get a better perspective. This one is slightly long, please bear with me 🙂
Background:
Me and ex age 30yr (started dating early 2013), childhood family friends (best friends let me mention. Would always find ways to stick around each other be it playing, hanging out, chatting, fighting, etc), different religion though, have dated multiple ppl before eventually started dating each other in 2013. Strted as long distance and was difficult to maintain since she was cheated in her past relations and even though she knew me better it was still difficult to have a stable trusting foundation. We used to talk for hours (atleast 3-4 hrs everyday ALL THIS TIME) and sometimes we fought on regular couple stuff (jealousy, not giving time, not replying after reading a msg etc) and used to make up right aftr.

I made it a point to fly down to my home country every 6 months to make sure she doesnt feel lonely. During one of the visit i had hinted my family of the fact that am gng to introduce them to someone. They figured this i guess and started acting weird from day 1 and it made things worse for me cos she couldnt trust my family either after that and was very depressed. I had to go back after 3 weeks and well couldnt accomplish what i thought i would (This was June 2013). Again i managed to make her calm down and lot of intensity in our talks, we could literally talk a 100 topics in 30 minutes, be stupid, do adult chat n then kiddish talks all the same time. I lost my job around this time and she was supportive of me during that period. I started a business soon after and she quit her job in the home country to help me out. My business required me to network with lot of doctors and their assistants (females mostly) which again made her jealous and it would again cause fights where i would tell its over then she would cry a lot and beg for forgiveness and i used to be hurt again n again by the lack of trust that i would disconnect for 2-3 days (not a good way may be) n then again get back. This took a toll on my business cos most of my time went in trying to not make her cry. I could understand her emotions but very lil i could do from such a long distance. Jan 2014 i make one more trip, she planned a 2 day surprise for me and was overjoyed.. we get physical the first time the same night i have to leave. Again the long distance thing started and this time i was looking for a new job, stress levels high due to business also needing attention and my love life too.

I used to always warn her about certain guys cos i knew their intentions and she wouldnt believe me but after some time would find out i was totally right about them (i do manage to gauge ppl’s intentions intuitively) and this would make her feel as if she is not intelligent enough. She is smart as a fox but she was very underconfident in this period i didnt help her case much by showing her how she was slacking in the business too. A guy (unknown) once contacted her online under the pretence of career help and i warned her he has not so gud intentions. She didnt reply him after that. We still fight, make up, love each other more after every argument, make more memories, plan future, etc. End of 2014 she says she is feeling suffocated and is done with me (after a series of small arguments where i dun talk for a couple of days) and her health goes down and I decide to leave my job and business and come back for good in Feb 2015. I had sensed something was terribly wrong cos she kept telling me to forget her and move on and how i treated her, how she doesnt live up to my expectations etc. On my arrival she made me meet a guy and i sensed immediately this is the same online guy and i left the meeting place and she cried like crazy and called me, met me with this fellow, told me she made a mistake, etc. (the guy was a drunk, verbally abusive, good with sweet comforting words which made her feel good about herself)

We managed to weather that storm, i accepted it was a mistake which both of us were responsible for and should try and forget. Few months later i found out she was in touch with the guy even after i had warned what his intentions were and she told me she isnt in touch. This didnt go down well with me and for the first time ever i yelled at her and called her mean words. She broke down bad and it took me a long time to again make her understand that this revelation hurt me more than anything as it breached my trust while she was having trust issues all this time. Both of us loved each other way too much to let go and eventually got back together. This time the issue was her parents were tired of seeing her cry so often and thought am ruining their daughters life. The mother always wanted a guy from the same religion.

Cut to last few months, I had started 2 new businesses, one involved a new product which is yet to be launched and another which is yet to make good profits (both started with her), had arguments in work, personal level both were gng very good, physical intimacy level was unheard of (not to boast but rarely did she not have an orgasm), made my family to accept her and she started coming to my house everyday where we would work and fool around. The issue? In work am a hard taskmaster and she felt i was not respecting her enough but the fact was i gave her responsibilities more than others to show her how much i value her talent and hardwork (also mentioned verbally a few times) but the rude words made her feel underconfident. Later she get a well paying job, which she takes, i show resentment cos she blew off the work commitments on two ventures and left me alone to work on them. A bitter email exchange ensued regarding share control etc (which initially i had given all to her to get her confidence back). She cried, her parents made her believe am a wrong partner for her, a selfish, rude, pull her down, etc

This time i had warned her before starting the job that a small argument and our relationship will be tested badly cos we wont get time to meet (her job, my busness, family gatherings, etc) and her parents will take that chance.. she said that wun happen…

I never disturbed her even for a day after she started her job. Our last email exchange was the fight before the job started and i had told her am supporting her decision to do the job but wun be interested in knowing how it is since i need to get my head back in the two ventures. She got upset, cried one day, broke down, her parents made her believe am evil and gave her an ultimatum to choose me and leave the house or now get a guy of their choice and not give them heartache (this has been a constant drama since 2 yrs now). She loves her dad and he got tired of seeing her cry and thus told her he wun see me ever even if she chooses to go with me.

Present situation:
– She messaged me one day she is moving on
– We meet the next day, she cries and says its a practical decision
– Meets guys next day
– One guy the parents like and approve
– She kept calling me everyday and kept telling its time to move on, let go, blamed me for my rude words, said i was perfect in every other way but my rude words (which i was not able to understand cos the last time was the email after which we were gng good, she also offered me from her paycheck to move out of my parents house just a week before telling me she is moving on). We were still intimate a week before the move on message
– Her parents come over and ask me to not bother her anymore as she wants to move on and has forgotten me.
– i told them she calls me and it doesnt look so. After making her dad understand the relation and the emotions involved he said do not communicated for 30 days and then he will see if both still have feelings for each other.
– I start my no contact period but realize that i cannot trust them so communicate with my ex and tell her about the condn placed by them when she is shocked cos they told her that i basically blamed her a lot when they came to meet me. Due to this she got pissed and told them to go ahead with the guy they like and they told the guys family that engagement can happen in december (this female has already gone through one engagement break up earlier before being with me)
– She is scared to harm her familys reputation and multiple times mentioned that her dad hates me, she will bear the consequences of this decision, blocked me on several platforms (though she still does some of the business work & i get notifications for same)
– The guy is quite opposite of me, he drinks, says used to smoke, himself had a recent break up, knows about me and her and how much impact i have had on her, still doesnt give her breathing space. She didnt tell me about the guy, i found out some and rest was gut feeling which turned out to be true when i asked her.
– she says the guy is good cos he listens to her and makes her feel good (again same pattern as of the online guy). She tells the guy yes then says she cannot trust him and same day the guy proposes her. She is taken by surprise and says thank you but this guy wastes no time to post the pictures online the next moment (got to knw from others since am blocked already)
– She is stuck in her own words and feels this is the right decision to go ahead with since he is same religion, family approves, cousins like him, stable job, similar field of work (Am opposite in several ways than him)
– She is crying everyday at home (she told me) and tells her parents cant get me out of her head, posting pics of him n her on social media, am blocked so get to know from friends (i dont ask them to show)

Am starting the NC period but am not sure if this is a case of rebound for her (his intentions my gut doesnt like). I have ended things on a very positive note and never made her feel am out there to hurt her or the relation though her parents did try to portray that.

Any word of advice, what you feel about this? Rebound? Calculated risk? She isnt thinking anymore about herself? She has moved on?
I know her since 25 years and i know for a fact that both will always love each other but is there a possibility to be “in love” again?
I have already started yoga, gym, diving into work, lost weight (she saw me a few days back “by accident” and was drooling over how i look and we spent an hour together talking, she crying, hugging each other in public and walking and not liking when i talk about meeting girls).

Apologies for the long tirade, but am scared of losing a person with whom I have already shared almost 40% of my life with that too the youngest age (assuming my avg lifespan is 70yrs)