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So my ex got a new girlfriend a few weeks ago. We live in a small town, so everyone knows everyone. No one knew they were talking or dating. Super hush hush. This girl comes from a very drama filled family (bat crap crazy is how people refer to her and her mom) She calls herself, a diva. She has a very low paying job, no education, a child from a previous relationship (she admits to getting pregnant to make the guy stay, but he didn’t). Doesn’t have any friends, or a social life, yada yada.
I know from reading some stuff on line that a sign of desperation in men is significantly lowering his standards, and rushing through major milestones in relationships. I know they have meet each other’s parents but they don’t seem to do much outside of hanging out with her family or staying at his house. Her or her family post constantly about how great he is or what they have been doing together. He doesn’t responds to the posts or even like them. He even hid the fact that they are in a relationships from is Facebook. It was there and now its gone. But it still shows on her page. I know she is a very controlling and pushy person. I also know his family and friends don’t think much of her. Most people in our town don’t.
When we were together he was very open about us being together. He told his parents about me, he wanted me and his friends to meet and hang out together. He complemented me all the time. Posted pics, snap chats, checked us into places. We broke up, because I think he was talking to another girl, and we had both been on travel for 2 months, and things fizzled
He tried to text/talk to me after we broke up. But after some rude texts when he was drunk. I blocked him on my phone and all social media, and went into No Contact. A week after I started No Contact he got this girlfriend, and has been going at a very fast pace. I’m worried she will get pregnant to trap him. They have only been dating a few weeks, he doesn’t seem too proud of her. More like it’s her and her family being pushy. If I tried re-friending him on Facebook, do you think he would respond? Or should I wait? Do I have a chance with getting back together with him?You should wait and stick to the NC. That is your best bet. Do not worry about the other girl, that is a rebound. Take the NC time and focus on yourself. If your ex has any sense, he will not get that girl pregnant, so get that out of your head too. You definitely have a chance of getting him back here, so don’t for a second think you don’t, but you need to use the NC and come to terms with your situation and clear your head. You got this! Keep everyone here posted.
On day 18 of NC myself…It is hard, but I am thinking clearer now. Very happy to be able to say that.
Yeah I agree, it sounds like that relationship is definately a rebound. If he’s hiding it. not being nearly as open about it and seriously lowering his standards (you know him best). It sounds like he’s almost ashamed of the new relationship and he’s trying to manage his pain. And if you say he was originally showed that they were in a relationship and then he proceeded to hide it after, it makes it seem like that even more! If you just keep up the NC and really evaluate it I’m sure the time will help you both get a new perspective!
That’s pretty much what I’m hoping for with my ex. I’m just starting NC and I’m not even sure how I’m feeling. I really want her back and I just want to message her but at the same time it seems pretty clear that we shouldn’t talk. And somedays I feel better about that! And I know more happy days will begin to come! We’ve just gotta hang in there! 😀
Thanks everyone! I have been in No Contact for a few weeks. And I know he took her to a family thing, but from what I understand, she, my ex and her baby stayed in the basement away from his family. I will stay in contact, with updates. Im just worried he has white night syndrome or will get attached to her kid, and stay for him. But we will see. And I have been trying to work on myself. Getting into better shape, spending time with friends.
A few weeks ago August 2nd, we where in the same bar, he flirted with me. But wouldnt actually talk to me. Later he texted me calling me a liar, and saying I was speaking poorly of him and his friends (which I did), and calling me “fecetious.” I asked him, what I lied about. He never responded, so I went into no contact the next day. Blocked or deleted him from everything. The next day he still waved at me at work. But knowing him, he didnt wake up until noon on Sunday, and was so drunk the night before he didnt remeber texting me. Then the NEXT weekend he was Facebook offical with this girl. But I do know the night at the bar he was asking mutual friends if I was still mad at him. And he had previously stated he didnt know why I was so angry. But my brother thinks, that he had been trying to or was talking to another girl, it didnt work out, so after he new he burned this bridge with me, he just went for low hanging fruit. This other girl, but she is crazy and a gold digger.Also for the longest time, when he would physicaly see me, he would look me up and down, clearly he liked what he saw. But never speak to me…just text me. But I know I am intemedating for him. I had to ask him out, he was clearly nervous about sex, and his proformance level. Sometimes I worry he wants to talk to me, but he is worried, or scarred of me, or how I will react.
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