Thinking it could be fully over….but should I still have some hope?

Hi all- kinda long post here.

Ex gf of 2.5 years broke up first weekend in November because of some transgressions of mine. Ones that I would love to and wish I could take back. We lived together and she moved out. We stayed in touch over the first 3 weeks with me while I was doing and saying everything I could to prove that I truly loved her and she could trust me. Things got to a point a couple days before thanksgiving where we would just small talk almost like we were back together. The day before thanksgiving she became very angry and said we should stop speaking….I spent the next week trying to reach her through phone calls, texts, Snapchat…no response. I was devastated on a whole new level than I was before. A week went by and I heard from her eventually late at night on a Thursday the week after thanksgiving. She asked over text “did you sleep with her?” In which I responded, no we did not. And I went on to bombard her with how happy I was to finally see her name pop up on my phone. She then said she texted me to ask a question and not have a conversation and went on to tell me she somehow got herself worked up. I asked if she missed me…she said “I don’t know I’m very angry”. I sent a couple nice things after that because of the opportunity and then decided to go NC. I didn’t hear from her for a week. Last weekend I get Snapchat videos of her at country concert essentially flipping me off in them and singing lyrics “you ain’t worth the whiskey” I don’t respond. Next day I finally decide to ask her what she meant by something she had said and just instantly said “leave me alone” “nothing matters”. She tells me that a hat of mine is by the road….so at some point she drove by the next day to throw my hat out. That night comes around and she ends up seeing my sister out….my sister sees her with another guy and they are together…i wake up Sunday morning to a flood of texts from her saying “leave me alone” “I’m talking to someone and I’m happy” “I want
Nothing to do with you”….etc etc. she had spoken to my sister and went on and on about things. I didn’t know what do so I asked her what happened and I was sorry for whatever did between her and my sister that night. I don’t hear back from her at all Sunday until Monday around noon. Tells me that she needs her mail (basic bank statements) and ask if I can leave it for her. I don’t respond and then she finally calls me a couple hours later and ofcourse I failed the NC rule again and answer. Over the phone call I ask her about the new dude. She tells me she’s happier than she was. She says atleast he doesn’t cheat on me. I tell her how that’s tough to hear about her seeing someone so soon after our 2.5 year relationship. She says she didn’t mean for it to happen and I decide the conversation is going nowhere. I asked her if she missed me in which she replies “no” instantly. We haven’t spoken or reached out to each other in a week. I’m so confused as to how I thought things were going well one minute and then bad the next. I know I’m searching here for answers I’ll more than likely never get. I guess her actions don’t make sense to me. She’s been speaking to this guy for awhile now but sent me videos in spite and I feel like she clearly isn’t over this but is trying her best to fill a void with this rebound relationship? She’s still very angry at me and I wonder if I waited to long for the NC rule? I’ve taken the high road everytime I’ve gotten some crazy texts from her telling me how “trash, pathetic, and worthless” I am. And idk how many times I’ve read f-you. Still trying to find answers along the lines of…is this over like I think it is? Or is there still hope?

I feel like I deserve all of this for what I did. I can hold onto the fact though that me and this other girl never got physical.

And trust me I’ve heard everything there could be said about how maybe I wasn’t teultmin love or there was a reason I did what I did. I can tell you the point of this is after 1.5 months of losing someone insanely important to me that I know I want her back. I don’t wanna lose the love of my life. We were very much in love at one point and I would do anything to show her that again. I just fear it may be too late.

I do know that she wanted to get married to me and have a life together. I can only hope that is still inside her somewhere.