How do I get her back from an impossible situation

Sounds like my last relationship. First thing I did was get a new job. I increased my gym activity to “excessive” level (It’s not like I wasn’t working out before, I just devoted much more time and effort into it post-relationship). I started going out and being social within 2 weeks of the actual breakup (I admit, I was a complete wreck for the first few days). In a sense, I did these things for all of the wrong reasons (I wanted to improve everything all at once, and win my ex back quickly), but eventually I realized that I should be doing those things for me; I already had the good habits, I just needed a mentality change.

Cry all you need to; someone very important to you has exited your life, I can’t think of a more genuine reason to cry. Time makes it better. For now you need to become content with the idea that you might never actually get her back, but you haven’t locked the door and thrown away the key. You’re not going to GET her back with the way things are now. Some people know what they want, and always appreciate a good person when they have them. Others, (to no fault of their own) are inherently fickle and WILL NEED that opportunity to explore before they’re willing to settle down with somebody. Since you said you were first lovers, the “lack of exploration” might have always been eliciting questions in the back of her mind like “If I’ve only experienced a relationship with him, how do I REALLY know if he’s the one?”

Two months no contact is a good start, but you need to stop carrying the weight that is the hope that you’ll be back together any time in the near future. Give her a chance to get out there and explore to her heart’s content (And try to look the other way, because keeping tabs on her and her new relationships is a surefire way to hinder the healing process). Maturity doesn’t come over a few months; it can take years. One day, you could possibly end up in each others’ lives again, and your relationship would be all the better because of this. However, you need to stop thinking of this as the light at the end of the tunnel, and move it over to the “back burner” of your mind while you heal.

You need to stop and evaluate all of those negatives she seen in you, if you guys didn’t do enough together show her that you like to go out and do things. If she thought you were a closed book work on your communication.

If your relationship was important to her when she sees these changes she will start to like them and obviously she liked and was attracted to you so it will help with her wanting you again. When a partner doesn’t like things they get unhappy and if they are unhappy they will start talking to someone that makes them happy so show her you can be that person that makes her happy.

Stop over analyzing things, we do that in hard times. I broke up with a girl and looked at her FB page and she had a picture of her and her new guy and all these pictures of them doing stuff together and it hurt. I stopped looking and I was much better then, as it turned out she contacted me and basically told me she wasn’t happy and they had a bad relationship. So just because on social media everything looks good that many times isn’t the case.

If you guys have been in contact you should wait for her to message you right now. She has another guy in her life and if you go initiating all the conversations you will look needy and it will make him look even better. She needs to miss and wonder about you, you guys don’t have to stop talking but when your ex has another man I think you should do the “fake friendship”, act like you want to be friends but it is really to show her you have changed but don’t be the one always coming to her or it will look like you are just trying to get her back. She needs to see that you are fine on your own.

My ex I didn’t talk to her for 4 months and next time she talked to me I told her I didn’t need her to be happy my life was great and I was having a blast, her life was not so great and she told me she missed me and asked me to see her. If they broke up with you it was for a reason and they need to see that reason is gone but you can’t make them see it, they have to see it for themselves.

If she is with another guy then you have to show her that you are a different person and wait for her to see it and if she does she will come back to you. If a woman is in a relationship with another guy then she has to want something else more or that relationship has to make her unhappy, that is really the only ways to get her away from him and possibly back to you.

I also want to add that have HER contact you,never do the mistake of you contacting her or showing that you are needy and your life is not moving forward without her,trust me I did this a lot and all my chances of her coming back was gone,girls like confident and happy guys,no one want to deal with your problems esp when they have a lot of there own.

So NO CALL NO MESSAGE NO EMAIL have her contact you very simple and when she does be happy and confident and talk very limited.

I know the feeling you have/had myself too me and my ex gf brokeup after 3 years relationship and she wanted to be friends after breakup and after sometime i started act needy because i still had feelings for her and felt she was only one for me so i acted desperately towards her what pushed her more and more away..so after some time i cut all the contact myself and started live on my own life what took some time but i got over it and started think her less and less everyday…so mate you can get over it too it just takes time..

But life is full on surprises because after 7 months total NC and living my own life my ex gf contacted me via email and she sayed she was thinking me for a while before contacting me, we have now talked few times on steam,and text app and she has comed to my place few times allready and leave when she gets tired.

So enjoy your life and think positively and world is your 🙂