Help!

Hi!

I’m 27 & he’s 28… when we first met he moved to America for a year and did long distance to the UK, then we moved in with my parents for a bit as I was buying a flat we could live in. I managed to finalise the flat just before February.. lockdown happened here in March. We where together exactly 2 years.

Our relationship has been really good and strong with rows of course but nothing awful. I recently got dumped by him unexpected, he feels like since being in a relationship he has regressed back to being a child (lazy and no motivation) because he just felt like being in a relationship wasn’t for him at this time in his life. He’s said the relationship was amazing, we have really good chemistry, he still thinks I’m the most amazing girl & I’ll always be special ( we went through a death of his sibling together plus the long distance !) Hes said he needs to just be alone and do things he felt like he couldn’t do – I never stopped him he just felt like it. Like going out or In the gym 2 hours a night etc. He felt like he couldn’t give me what I deserve at this time in life.

He’s said that he doesn’t want me to hold on and wants me to get on with my life etc, but he acknowledges that we have had a really good thing and promises when the time is right for him we can talk but it doesn’t mean we’ll be getting back together. He says he reflects on the relationship regularly and how good it was. I am also sad as we never had a time of ‘normal’ due to him being abroad and then stress of house buying and then lockdown.
He was in the army 6 years from 18 and then went to university late, hence now at 28 he feels like he needs to do some growing alone. He’s said it could have been anyone and it would be the same situation at this point in his life.

I haven’t started the NO contact rule just yet, we did a few days but due to exchanging stuff it’s been hard to stop, he also owes me a bit of money. Just wondering what everyone’s thoughts are?