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Hi you guys,
I am Julia and I am almost done with first month of NC. The plan is to keep it for 2 months.
It is so hard. I am getting better though. But the fact that I have no idea what he is doing can be quite excruciating. I am following every step of the plan as a.z so wisely suggests 🙂
It just feels that I am doing all the hard work and he just enjoys being single. I know I am more important than him and I should focus on my life. But this empty feeling when you miss someone doesn’t go away.Hi
I’m no a great expert, but I’ve felt and maybe still feel like you, and I want you to know that I completly understand you.It’s an horrible feelings, I felt like I was wasting precious time,and that it was so unfair that he’s enjoying life while I was here trying to not crumble.
I actually ended my NC a few days ago, after my mind cleared,and I made positive changes in my life. I did really change both my appereance and how I beheave, and I must say that I feel so much better.
It’s normal to think about him,or what he’s doing, but trust me I’ve blocked most of my thought about him, and yes you have to repeat yourself that there’s a possibility that you won’t have him back but you’ll fight with everything to try, so you’ll have no regrets.
The NC is not for him, it’s for you….it makes you grown in a different person,more confident and attractive, and yes you should walk around like you could have every man on earth at your feet.
And remember that you do all the hard work on yourself, he doesn’t have to do it ,because the break up was his decision .I see we have some things in common regarding the break up issue. One thing that this situation taught me is that you have to go through this by yourself. No one can actually understands the way you feel even if they had a similar experience while ago.
Even though during our last chit chat I gave him the impression I am doing things for myself and I am happy, he managed to ruin the whole thing! What I mean is this and I would like your insight:
My roommate and friend is also his friend (actually I met him through her). While we were chatting he asked me if I talk to her. I responded: ‘Does it matter?’ And then he goes: ‘You are asking and I know it’. The truth is I did ask her since I made her telling me that he is seeing someone else. So I assume what happened she revealed to him that she had to tell me about this other person since I kept asking her.
All these thoughts were running through my head while he was telling me this and all I could think of was that you can trust no one!!! So I told him in the nicest way that he shouldn’t trust her cause I certainly don’t trust her and I left the conversation. What he did though was totally unexpected cause he contacted her on the same day ‘accusing’ her of telling me everything he is telling her which is so not true. I mean what the hell???! She immediately texted me and asking what had happened. It got so messed up and I explained my side of the story. Bottom of line I am now so indifferent to her and I am mad at him! That is why I decided to follow NC for 2 months just to calm down.
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