Boards Not Your Ex Bonds, connections, and other points of interest

To post a reply login or register

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 90 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #27618
    ThePhoenix
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 144

    @patrick_d and I have been talking about the bonds we have with special people and how we can almost feel what they’re feeling. Feel free to join in and talk about anything else that you find odd/unique!

    #27622
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    So the nervousness is slowly subsiding. That suggests that I was pushing them away. Maybe nothing on her part at all. It might have been good but I didn’t react correctly. Or maybe she was pushing me? Thoughts?

    #27631
    ThePhoenix
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 144

    I find that when we take emotions and feelings that make us feel uneasy and simply acknowledge them, but switch our focus to something more positive, we tend to reap the benefits. It’s possible she was thinking about you and feeling nervous, or it could just simply be nerves on your end.

    What was going through your head in detail when this was happening?

    #27632
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    I bet the psychic tells you something about your mind when you go there. What are you hoping/expecting to hear?

    #27633
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    I was reading this and thinking of you and our conversation. Then suddenly an image of her and a nervousness. I pictured her at first talking to someone about me. But then started imagining her with him. That made me worse. But looking back I may have made things worse on myself by not chilling out

    #27634
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    How do you switch these feelings to something positive?

    #27641
    ThePhoenix
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 144

    I’m hoping she’ll either affirm my gut feelings, or simply tell me to move on honestly. We’ll see how it goes though.

    It sounds like you may have amped up your feelings unintentionally. When I get jittery at times of thoughts with my former partner, I take a moment to decipher why I am feeling that way. More often that not, it’s out of fear. It sounds odd, but I kind of talk to my inner child. I accept that the feelings are just that, feelings. I try not to label them as negative ones as I know I can turn them around. I tell myself that it’s okay to feel that way in that moment, but it’ll get better.

    For example, being fearful of what may or may not be doesn’t do me any good. I redirect it into excitement and put perspective on myself. I focus on how well I’ve been doing and what new opportunities may lay ahead of me. A lot of this ties in to what my counselor has been working with me on (I don’t need to continue going, but I choose to so I can better myself). When she asked me how I felt about how things ended, I told her I was frustrated. Apparently frustration is not an emotion, but a mask for something deeper. I was able to pin point, after some reflecting, that I was really feeling angry and sadness; angry because I had been going through the motions of working toward proposal and was met with betrayal and deceit, sadness because I felt I lost something very dear to me. It takes practice, but the more you’re able to identify and work through the feelings, the easier they are to manage.

    Did that help any? lol

    #27644
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    It did. Gives me something to think about. I went out there for a smoke. It’s snowing. And I thought of what I’ll do at work tomorrow and trying to find a gym that will take me in for just a few months. And then things felt ok again.
    I better sleep now. I’m in Germany so it’s well after midnight. Chat tomorrow. Sleep well

    #27647
    ThePhoenix
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 144

    Sounds good. Sleep well and I hope you have pleasant dreams!

    #27757
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    Tut tut. Getting drunk and flirting. But you liked it. Good for you. This ex sounds nice

    #27878
    ThePhoenix
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 144

    Haha, well it’s been the most fun I’ve had with an old flame in awhile. As I said before this ex and I were young, stupid teenagers when we had a thing going on (she had to have been 15/16 and I was 17/18) and she agrees with this as well. We always got along swimmingly and hit it right off the bat. We’re both very artistic, pretty laid back, and love video games and movies. Ironically we’re both scorpios. Both being scorpios, that’s an interesting thing as we get one another… especially the misunderstanding most people get with us. Birds of a feather flock together I guess. 😛

    How have you been holding up today?

    #27901
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    Hello. I’ve been Ok. Strange day sort of. Was thinking a lot about LoA. Yesterday too. Even bought something yesterday for the future goal. Acting like it has already happened. Kept telling myself how Good things are. Job, first wages in over a year yesterday, football, new friends, started acting this week.
    Then I got 2 messages from you know who. One at midday and one this evening.
    Second one was wanting to talk again. I can’t reply of course because I’m not ready and the new man may still be on the scene. Don’t want to be friend zoned. But I felt powerful. Really powerful.
    Maybe it’s still just about being friends but it’s a bit intense.
    What do you make of all that?
    And another question. Would they get really freaked out if they read this or heard about this site?

    #27902
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    P.s. Sounds like you’re into this girl?
    Maybe you’ve been looking the wrong way all the time. And something is being given back now?

    #27911
    ThePhoenix
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 144

    Sounds like you’ve been doing really well! I’m impressed that she’s reached out to you, but proud of you for sticking to your guns. That power, my good man, is from the power being in your favor. She’s lost it by contacting you and wanting to initiate a talk. I get the not wanting to be friendzoned, and if this dude is still in the picture avoid it at all costs.

    I’m sure they would probably be freaked out if they saw what had been written. Most of our exes are in an emotional state lately it seems (from what I’ve seen across the boards). It probably would not be a good thing at all.

    Yeah, you know that thought had crossed my mind. I’ve been working on LoA and I’ve had all these people come into my life recently, including my first ex. We’ve been texting off and on all day while we’re both working. Could be the universe doing it’s thing and I am not complaining in the least bit! 😉

    #27917
    patrick d
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 531

    You seem really happy. I’m happy for you and that makes me happy. I feel really good tonight. We might be helping each other along or something because things seem to be happening fast.
    If the dude is still on the scene then I don’t want to go near her. I will be the emotional crutch. She text a bit earlier in the week but today was different. She feels the power has moved I think. Even though there is another man (I think) I almost feel in control. He should be gone soon. She has to wake up to her feelings and not fool herself.
    It’s nice to find peace in your mind again. I’m content just sitting doing nothing. It’s a long time since I could do that. Let the universe do its thing. No need to force anything anymore.

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 90 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.